Stress coaching

What is stress?

Sometimes it’s easy to tell when we’re stressed, but other times we may not recognise the signs. This is because stress can show up in different ways, often affecting us physically and emotionally.

When we feel stressed, our bodies release cortisol and adrenaline. This is part of the body's natural response to pressure or perceived threat and prepares us to be able to fight, run away or freeze (called the 'fight, flight or freeze' response). 

These days, the things that cause us stress may not be life-threatening. We might feel stressed about things like work, relationships or financial pressures, but our bodies can still respond as though we're facing a threat. If stress is intense or continues for a long time, it can affect both our physical and mental health.

In this video, life coach Chantal Dempsey discusses how coaching can support you to manage stress.

Signs and symptoms of stress

To help identify whether or not you’re stressed, look out for the following common stress symptoms:

• a sense of overwhelm
• racing thoughts
• feeling anxious
• difficulty sleeping
• a change in appetite
• snapping at people
• difficulty making decisions
• feeling tearful
• shallow breathing
• headaches
• digestive issues
• chest pain
• feeling dizzy
• muscle tension
• feeling tired all the time.

Stress can affect us in different ways, and the causes can vary. For some, it’s triggered by being under pressure, coping with a big change or lacking control in a situation. For someone else, a lack of things to do can cause stress.

What’s stressful for one person may not necessarily be stressful for another. You may have a clear cause for your stress, or it may be a build-up of smaller things. This will all depend on our individual circumstances.

Getting support with stress

There are lots of ways to deal with and reduce stress, and it’s important to find what works for you. This may mean making lifestyle changes and using self-help techniques (we share some tips on this further down), or it may mean getting professional support.

If you’re worried about your mental health, consider seeking support from an appropriate mental health professional, such as a counsellor. If you’re looking for support with goals, habits or practical changes relating to stress, you may find it helpful to explore life coaching. 

How can coaching help with stress?

A coach aims to offer you space, reflection, and clarity. When it comes to stress, the coach’s aim is to help you explore what may be contributing to your stress, rather than to 'fix' the symptoms. This happens through a series of conversations in which the coach asks questions to help you gain understanding and offer insights or reflections you may not have considered.

Having someone to talk to can give you space to reflect on what's contributing to your stress, without fear of judgement.

Stress coaches may also help you develop strategies and coping techniques to reduce stress and cope better when it arises. This may include learning relaxation skills, journalling techniques or even meditation.

Understanding what may be contributing to your stress can help you identify habits or behaviours you might want to change – for example, setting boundaries or saying "no" more often.

Sometimes, we can't control the stressful situations we face. Coaching may help you explore how you respond to these situations and develop ways to cope.

Look for someone who is happy to have a chat and listen to what you have to say – rather than someone who is just trying to sell themselves. Ask how they might approach your situation.

-Rachel Coffey, BA, MA, NLP Mstr, Can life coaching help with anxiety and stress? 

What to expect from stress coaching

Once you have found a coach you’re happy to work with, you can book an initial consultation. This is often a meeting or call where you can outline what you’re struggling with and see whether you and your coach are a good fit.

When you’re both happy, you can start the coaching process. This will differ depending on the coach; however, it typically involves a number of conversations that take place in person or online. Throughout these conversations, you may explore what's contributing to your stress and identify practical ways to manage it.

You may set goals for yourself and choose particular areas to focus on in each session. Your coach can tell you more about how many sessions you’ll have and how they’ll work.

When you reach the end of your coaching, you can reflect on your progress and make an action plan for how you’ll move forward without your coach. They may well offer thoughts and suggestions for self-help techniques you can utilise to continue the work from coaching.

Stress management tips

Alongside and after your coaching, you may be encouraged to try some self-help techniques to help reduce your stress. Here are some examples of what may be recommended.

Organise your time

Time (or lack thereof) can often influence our stress levels. Learning how to prioritise and manage your time can help when you feel overwhelmed. Try setting clear boundaries and don’t be afraid to say no if you’re unable to attend an event or take on more work – your health should be a priority.

Ask for help

Delegating tasks and asking for support can help to lift the pressure you may be feeling. This could be at work (for example, asking your manager for support with a task) or in your personal life (for example, asking your parents to look after the kids one afternoon).

Make time for self-care

Self-care is anything that involves taking care of yourself. This can be as simple as taking a shower or as extravagant as booking a five-star holiday in the Maldives. Take time to consider what self-care practices you have in place and whether you could benefit from adding more to your routine.

Be mindful of caffeine

Caffeine can affect sleep and may make feelings of anxiety harder to manage. If you're feeling stressed or having trouble sleeping, you may find it helpful to consider how much caffeine you're having.

Use relaxation techniques

Meditation, mindfulness and deep breathing exercises can all help you to manage stress when it arises. There are lots of apps available to help you learn, and it’s something you can come back to time and time again.

Get active

Being active can help to reduce stress and support your overall wellbeing. The key is to find an activity you enjoy, whether that's going for a walk, joining a class or going to the gym.

Make space for play

Try to incorporate fun into your schedule! Work and home life can feel very serious at times, so it helps to inject a little laughter into your day. Watch a funny movie or plan a games night with friends.

Support your sleep

Lack of sleep can make stress feel more intense and harder to deal with. Creating a regular wind-down routine and reducing screen time before bed may help you sleep better.

Take breaks

Make sure you take breaks not only throughout your day but throughout your month and year. Book time off, schedule rest and if you can, plan some getaways. A change in routine can often feel as good as a rest.

Build a support network

Surround yourself with supportive people and turn to them when you need to. Spend time connecting with friends and family – talking about what’s worrying you can help you process how you’re feeling.

Find a coach to support you with stress

If stress is affecting your day-to-day life and you’d like support making practical changes, working with a coach may be an option. A coach can give you space to explore what’s contributing to your stress, identify areas you’d like to change and develop strategies that work for you.

Explore our stress coaches below to learn more about their experience, approach and ways of working. You can read their profiles and contact a coach directly when you find someone who feels like a good fit.