What's the link between communication skills and self-confidence?

Strong communicators are often self-confident. This is because to communicate authentically, there has to be a level of personal risk. We only take those risks when we're confident in our ability to handle the outcome.


This article looks at this relationship and outlines how effective communication can bolster self-confidence, and conversely, how a sense of self enhances our communicative abilities.

Understanding the link

The foundation of self-confidence in communication

At the heart of effective communication lies self-confidence. It is the self-assurance that gives us the courage to speak out, share our thoughts, and assert our opinions. When we feel confident, we are more likely to engage in conversations, express ourselves clearly, and stand firm (but flexible - this is important and if you're not at least a little flexible, it indicates a little lack of confidence). 

Communication as a booster of self-confidence

Engaging in successful communication acts as a positive feedback loop for self-confidence. Each time we convey our ideas effectively and receive a response that is supportive or acknowledges our viewpoint, our self-confidence gets a boost. It's akin to muscle training – the more we practice and succeed, the stronger our confidence becomes.

Overcoming communication barriers with confidence

High self-confidence enables us to overcome common communication barriers such as fear of judgment or social anxiety. When we are confident, we worry less about how others perceive us and focus more on the substance of our message. We also focus more on being present in the moment which is always a good indicator of how self-confident someone is. 

Self-confidence in non-verbal communication

It's not just about what we say, but also how we say it. Self-confidence is recognised by others when we see congruence between our non-verbal cues like body language, eye contact, and tone of voice and what we say. A relaxed, confident stance and grounded voice commands attention and respect, making the communication more effective.

Examples of this link

Public speaking

When speaking to an audience when we share in an authentic way, a speaker is engaging. Being natural encourages us to connect with the speaker. We'll listen more attentively and remember more of what they say. visible. A confident speaker holds an audience, while the act of speaking to an engaged audience further boosts the speaker’s confidence too.

Professional interactions

In the workplace, confidence allows professionals to communicate their ideas more persuasively, leading to better collaboration and leadership opportunities. They're able to engage in the hard conversations productively and constructively. This, in turn, enhances their self-esteem and confidence in their professional abilities.

Personal relationships

In personal relationships, confidence enables individuals to express their thoughts and feelings openly, leading to healthier and more honest communication. The more a space feels safe the more we're likely to build intimacy. The more self-trust we have and the more we feel comfortable with our own emotions, the more like a space will feel safe. 

How to build communication skills and self-confidence

Practice and preparation

Like any skill, both communication and self-confidence can be improved with practice. Preparing for conversations or presentations can alleviate anxiety and build confidence to some extent but a big part of it is also practice. We're never going to be prepared for every eventuality so we have to use each experience as a learning opportunity - both in terms of what we can practically do differently and how we can connect and understand our mindset and Self.

Positive reinforcement

Acknowledging and celebrating small victories in communication can boost confidence. It’s important to recognize progress and not just the end result. Squeeze the juice of the lemon for all it is worth in every scenario as best you can and try to see where you're brain is naturally going towards the negative. 

Feedback and learning

Feedback is invaluable. Learning from miscommunications or where we could do something different without self-judgment builds resilience and more importantly confidence in the fact that we can learn. When we have this confidence we can then feel hopeful about our situation. 

Communication and self-confidence are interconnected. Improving communication can lead to a rise in self-confidence, and each boost in self-confidence can make us better communicators.

By nurturing both, we empower ourselves to handle the complexities that come with being human. This leads to more fulfilling personal and professional relationships. It expands our comfort zones, gives us the confidence to step out of them and leads to more opportunities too.

The views expressed in this article are those of the author. All articles published on Life Coach Directory are reviewed by our editorial team.

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London SW1V & NW1
Written by Rebecca Cockayne, BA. (Oxon), MSc, GDL | Delphi Coaching
London SW1V & NW1

Bex is a coach who loves journeys. She's done a lot and has been on many internal and external ones. She loves to help people long their path too.

She specialises in coaching people on building their purpose, accessing their self confidence and helping them communicate.


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