8 signs you're quietly confident
You may think that confident people are generally extroverts, highly gregarious and loud. However, confidence isn't about being bold or brash or the centre of attention. True confidence is quieter and comes from an internal belief in your abilities, skills and value.
Signs of quiet confidence
From working with confident people and supporting clients to build their confidence I've identified the following signs of a quietly confident person:
1. A willingness to share their opinion and to be wrong
A quietly confident person will speak up for what they believe is right but is also prepared to accept that sometimes they are wrong. Being brave enough to share their opinion yet humble enough to learn from others is key.
2. An absence of the need to compare themselves
As quietly confident people have accepted their strengths and weaknesses they do not need to compare themselves to others to boost their self-esteem. Instead they simply focus on their own path ahead of them.
3. An acceptance of mistakes
Taking responsibility for mistakes and admitting them to others is a sign of someone who is comfortable with their self-worth. We all make mistakes, we're only human and those who are quietly confident recognise and embrace this.
4. An ability to speak up for their wants and needs
As they value themselves and their opinions the quietly confident person is comfortable to ask for their wants or needs. Communicating what support you want or need can feel difficult at first, but with practice you'll see how it eases stress and communication.
Read our tips for building quiet confidence.
5. An openness to taking risks
Without knowing if they are 100% able to achieve a goal, a quietly confident person is willing to take a risk. They are confident in the knowledge that whatever the outcome is they can cope because they are aware of their internal resilience.
6. A belief in their self-worth
This allows a quietly confident person to give themselves praise and positive feedback and as a result to need less validation from others. When we stop seeking external validation, we see how capable we are and that we don't need to prove ourselves to anyone.
7. An acceptance of their vulnerabilities
Having accepted their weaknesses a quietly confident person is happy to ask for help when appropriate. When we shine a light on our strengths and weaknesses we see what areas we need help with, and when we have confidence in ourselves, we feel no fear in asking others to help.
8. An ability to actively listen
This means focusing on the other person with a mind clear of distractions so that they feel understood. Quietly confident people will also listen more than they speak.
These signs may seem daunting at first. If that's the case, I suggest you take one at a time and ask yourself if you demonstrate that particular characteristic. If not, then take up the challenge to work towards it in small steps, by practising regularly.
If you think you would benefit from support while you do this, use our tool to find a confidence coach who can guide you.