Struggling to move on from a bad job or company?

Is it bad or have things simply changed so that you no longer have the same values as you once did? Have you got a new manager with whom you have very different ideas? You may know that this is no longer the right place for you, but the fear of not getting another job or one that might be worse than this one can hold you back.

The fear of change

The thing is, we have to accept these uncertainties in all aspects of our life and more often than not, you get on with it, survive it and learn from it – sometimes you thrive from it because it turned out better for you. A new job might too.

The likelihood is that you have changed, your needs have changed and the restructuring no longer provides you with what you need to feel fulfilled or purposeful, or is not flexible enough for the new lifestyle you have – family, travel, and general work/life balance.

Take some time to review what you wanted when you started and when things were at their best, and consider what it is you need and want today. Starting with these points will help you to seek out these qualities and opportunities in other organisations, you can tailor the industry and roles that align with your beliefs and goals.

Restructures are for the company’s revised goals and objectives, not yours or your teams. You shouldn't feel guilty for no longer sharing the same mission.

The world changes and so do we, and businesses will change as well as the overall workplace culture – employer and employee expectations, and new ways of working, such as a new piece of tech or product, social media or AI.

When you started, it was great because you worked to your own values and skill set, talents and tendencies that suited both of you – but now you have changed (and maybe the business too) and your role no longer serves you, other than making money. Perhaps this isn’t your value system, or you have found a new skill, talent or interest that excites you more and you want to find the place to use it and develop it!

Like relationships having to be at the right time, with the right person, and in the right environment, we cannot make something fit. The person may have many things we like, admire, and need, but perhaps there are one or two factors that we don’t want or do not work at this current time, and therefore, it isn’t going to be a success.

People change all the time. Teams flex and change. We form/storm/norm then perform with any change – and the only certainty in life is that change happens. We hear this often, and it is so true, nothing stays the same for long, and nor should it.

The best or worst situations change, maybe too soon or not fast enough, but they inevitably will change. Job roles, responsibilities, companies, outlooks, services or products will come and go as needs or expectations keep changing with the people who hold those views. Change is fun. It is a part of life and the excitement of exploring your options, finding new opportunities, and learning to create opportunities should be too.

Embracing the discomfort

Do something different every day and the fear of change and general discomfort becomes less difficult and scary when the fight/flight stress reaction kicks in. Stay with the discomfort until it subsides – "flooding" is a technique for ridding phobias because, eventually, the stress is so high that it stops and gradually comes down.

It is uncomfortable and seemingly unnecessary, but you can accept the discomfort to some extent, especially knowing there is a new opportunity on the other side. Remember, that choice will be yours, the levels of discomfort and stress are yours to manage over time and you will adapt and find ways to reduce it.

This might be going for that new job after 20 years, or two or three years. It might be as little as six months if you realise the position was not what you wanted or expected.

You have the power to make those changes, decisions and explorations. You have the power to accept some level of discomfort and eventually, with practice, reduce the reaction to manageable, acceptable levels that result in growth!

Like the stress of going to an interview but the bus is late – you still arrive and while a little unnerved and hurried, you do it and it goes OK. Perhaps you could have done better, but it is unlikely that the unforeseen incident affected the outcome if you didn’t let it. Instead, you managed to push through the struggle for the duration of the interview. You did it. You survived it despite the discomfort, and despite your reservations, you may well have been offered that job offer, and if not, it's just the beginning.

Any change is uncomfortable, but getting used to the feeling and ultimately, embracing the discomfort, will help you throughout life when the inevitable happens for you.

Saying all this, embracing change and making the jump to leave a job or career – particularly when you need the income – can be frightening, especially going it alone. By working with a coach, you gain the support you need to take the step that is right for you. The coach won't tell you the answers but will guide you through finding the answers within yourself and uncovering what it is that is holding you back, what it is you want to achieve and how to get there.