What's stopping you from achieving your goals?

It's easy to set a goal with enthusiasm, only to realise a few weeks or months later that you haven't made the progress you expected. Perhaps you wanted to find a new job, try something different or simply take better care of your well-being.

Not reaching a goal doesn't necessarily mean you've failed. Instead, it can be an opportunity to step back and reflect on what got in the way and whether the goal still matters to you.

There can be many reasons why we don't make the progress we'd hoped for. Here are four questions you might find useful to reflect on.

1. Is a lack of self-belief holding you back?

Sometimes, a lack of self-belief can affect the actions we're willing to take. You might find yourself thinking, 'I'd love to start my own business' or 'I'd love to run a marathon', while another part of you questions whether you're actually capable of doing it.

Ask yourself whether there's evidence behind those doubts or whether a lack of confidence is preventing you from exploring what's possible. Building self-belief can take time, so consider what small step might help you test what you're capable of.

2. Are you worried about failing or being judged?

Perhaps you've considered joining a class, applying for an opportunity or trying something unfamiliar, only to change your mind when the time comes. There could be many reasons for this, but sometimes fear of failure or worrying about what other people will think can play a part.

Ask yourself, if you weren't worried about being judged, what would you be doing right now?

3. Does the goal really matter to you?

Sometimes we pursue a goal because somebody else thinks we should, or because we feel we have something to prove. It can be useful to step back and ask why the goal matters to you personally.

What would achieving it give you? Is it something you genuinely want, or something you feel you should want? Understanding your motivation can help you decide whether this is still a goal you want to pursue.

4. Are past experiences affecting your next step? 

A previous setback doesn't necessarily predict what will happen next time. Instead of allowing an earlier experience to decide what you do now, consider what you learnt from it. Is there anything you would prepare for or approach differently this time?

You don't have to take a huge leap. One small, realistic step towards your goal may be enough to help you start moving forward again.

If the above rings true with you, take some time and reflect on something you wanted to achieve in the past but didn’t quite get there. Really challenge yourself on what you think stopped you; was it one of the above, or something totally unique to you? Rather than criticising yourself for not achieving it, get curious about what happened.

You might ask yourself:

• What did I originally want to achieve?
• Why did it matter to me?
• What got in the way?
• Does that barrier still exist?
• What have I learnt from the experience?
• What's one realistic step I could take now?

Sometimes, understanding what's getting in the way is the first step towards deciding what you want to do differently. If you know you want to make a change but are struggling to move forward, working with a coach can give you space to explore what's holding you back, clarify what matters to you and identify manageable next steps.