Why does your own thinking matter?

If you're thinking about having some coaching, you've probably reached some kind of crunch point in your life. Perhaps you see an opportunity for a new role but you don't know whether to take the risk. Maybe you've realise you've had enough of feeling overwhelmed, but you can't figure out how to change things.

At these times, it's tempting to look to other people for answers. Many of us will ask friends, family or trusted colleagues what they think we should do. That's sensible - these people know us well and may offer useful advice. But ultimately, you have to take the decision for yourself,  which is why it's important to know what you think. 

That's where coaching comes in. A good coach won't tell you what to do. Instead, they will give you the space for you to do your own thinking. And they'll support you to do that thinking productively. So if you're the sort of person who ruminates or overthinks things, a focused coaching session can help you untangle your thoughts and get to a conclusion. Or if you're the sort of person who rushes from pillar to post, your coaching session may finally give you the time to think all the way through and around your challenge so your next burst of action is more productive.

That's all well and good you might say, but what if I don't know what I think, or what if I think my thinking isn't any good? Again, coaching helps here. In so much of our lives, from childhood and school and into the workplace, other people tell us what and how to think. It's not surprising that many of us lose confidence in our own ability to figure stuff out for ourselves. We increasingly turn to other people, and the more we do that, the more our confidence in our own thinking slips away. And the more we lose our trust in our own thinking, the more we find ourselves lost, overwhelmed, and unable to take decisions for ourselves. 

Coaching helps you reconnect with your ability to think well for yourself. With the right space, time and support, your thinking powers will spring into life and start making the connections and discoveries you need to help you take your big decision. Once you know you can think well with your coach, you will increasingly find yourself thinking well in other parts of your life and work. And because better actions emerge from better thinking, you'll find yourself feeling more confident and in control of what happens next.   

I often start my coaching sessions with the question 'what do you want to think about, and what are your thoughts?' Always - whether slowly, falteringly, silently or perhaps in a great rush - the client's thoughts emerge. And then wave after wave of thinking follows until a point of clarity appears and the next steps come into view.  

These thoughts - your thoughts - are the only thoughts that matter. It will be you taking those next steps, not your friends, family or work colleagues. You will need to have thought through how you will find the courage and commitment to try something new, have the tricky conversations, and make the next move.    

That's why your own thinking matters, and why coaching is a useful way to explore and develop your thinking. What do you think?