Are you ready to stop feeling disappointed in yourself?

I see you, you’ve got a goal, you tell yourself and the world you really want it, you’re hopeful and expectant, you’ve put the work in and yet, it’s not there, today is not the day.
 
You can’t help but feel a sense of disappointment; perhaps one day it is a little bit of self-doubt; another, it could be personal failure. It’s not long before you can hear yourself being unkind towards yourself, that you’re out of your league or you’re not enough? After that, maybe it is turning to an unhelpful coping strategy (emotional eating, biting of nails, lashing out to those around you) and the eventual consequence of even more disappointment and self-doubt.

The purpose of this article it is to say, all of that is okay. All of this is perfectly normal human behaviour, particularly when faced with big or difficult emotions. It’s okay.

If that pattern resonates with you and your usual next step is to decide that you somehow need ‘fixing’ or to work harder, or that you must have a problem, keep reading.
 
If you hold on to the idea that you’ve got to start all over, that somehow it is either black or white, I’d love for you to consider the grey - the messy middle - where you accept it all and simply do nothing, other than to bring your awareness to it. Journaling can be a really helpful coping mechanism to process feelings and also to become the observer of ourselves.

Journaling for self-awareness

The following journal prompts can support you in raising your awareness of what the messy middle might look like, take a moment of pause, to reflect and see what comes up. Before you begin, give yourself permission to be vulnerable and honest with yourself.

Know that whatever you write is for you and you alone, unless you wish to share it. Approach this with kindness and non-judgement as much as you are able and answer the questions in whichever way they resonate with you in this moment. There is no right or wrong.

1. 1. How can I be kind to myself right now? What would I say to a friend in my situation? If it feels difficult to accept the same kindness that you would give to a friend, how can I be kind to myself about that?
2. What felt like the trigger to me?
3. Where do I feel that emotion in my body? Does it have a colour, a shape, movement, temperature, size? What emotion is it? What are the thoughts that follow? Observe it all without judgement.
4. What is it I want to work towards? What is important to me about it? Does it feel in alignment with my values and personal motivations?
5. What aligned action can I take right now?
6. What have I learnt about myself?
7. How would I like to cope differently in the future?

By using journaling to help us explore and better understand ourselves, it can help us to observe that we are not back where we started, and that we are always learning and growing. It can help us to accept that we are human beings and that riding the waves is all part of it. You are building resilience and it’s okay to feel proud of yourself.

If you’d like to learn more about yourself and to build a more joyful and free relationship with yourself, book a free discovery call with me.