The difference between confidence and self-esteem

People don't often understand that there is a difference between confidence and self-esteem. They will often say they lack confidence when what they really mean is that they lack self-esteem.

Confidence is a belief in oneself and one's powers or abilities externally. When people are asked to describe who they are at work, for instance, they often feel a sense of power and importance driven by the abilities and knowledge they have gained through training and learning. This empowers them to feel like 'somebody of value', allowing them to value themselves highly in that specific situation, perhaps scoring themselves a nine out of ten.

Self-esteem, on the other hand, is the value you place on yourself from an internal, standalone perspective. When people are asked to describe who they are from an internal point of view, many tend to focus on their negative aspects (e.g. feeling too fat or disliking their nose), which leads them to devalue who they really are. When asked to list the things they love about themselves or the value they place on themselves as a person, they struggle, often scoring themselves as low as a four out of ten.

One way to explore this difference is to stand in front of a full-length mirror and picture the 'you' in your most confident situation. Listen to your internal voice and take note of the strengths it highlights.

Next, stand in front of that same mirror and simply look at 'you' as you are. Listen to your internal voice and note what it picks out. Then, challenge yourself to write down five specific things you see that you genuinely like and wouldn't change.

Finally, review how you feel about the person in the mirror. By focusing on your core qualities, you are bound to feel much better about 'you'.