The Frozen phenomenon

Let me ask you a question... Why did Disney’s Frozen gross over $1.2 billion dollars worldwide? Was it the music, the CGI, the acting, the amazing dresses, maybe people just really like happy snowmen! For me, one of the most amazing aspects of the movie was the key message of “Let it go!”

In my empowerment coaching practice, one of the techniques I always use is Covey’s Circles of Influence. This is a diagram of three circles, the middle circle is you and what you can control. The second outer circle contains things you have some influence over and the outer circle is for those things we have no control over.

In a session with a client, I will ask them to write down a list of things that are causing them stress, anxiety or a low mood. For example not getting on with their boss, having trouble sleeping or feeling under time pressure. I then ask them to place these issues within one of the circles. It’s a really simple technique but it allows us to categorise and clearly see where our negative feelings may be coming from.

Once the aspects are in the circles they can be reconceptualised and dealt with individually:

• Feeling under time pressure is controllable such as leaving 10 minutes earlier for work to avoid the rush hour.
• Having trouble sleeping could be improved by creating a better bedtime routine such as turning off your phone or not watching television in bed.

However what if we can't deal with something as it is in that nasty outer circle? It’s simple, as Elsa said, we have to “Let it go!”.

This is not to say we ignore the problem. Your boss isn’t going to suddenly have a personality transplant be nice to you (no matter how hard you wish on a star!) But you can change your thinking styles, perceptions, reactions and control around the situation. For example:

• Rather than blaming yourself, realise that they are rude to everyone, you are not the problem… they are!
• If you really love where you work and the job you do try to focus on the positive aspects of the workplace rather than that one (annoyingly) negative one.
• Speak to a supervisor about your feelings to see if the situation could be improved.

You may need to think about looking for another job if the problem continues where you will be treated with respect and happier.

Therefore by letting go of the stress and anxiety the situation is causing, you can replace these feelings with positive, effective action instead! So remember next time you feel under pressure, stressed or negative ”Let it go” and take back control!

If you would like any advice on using this or any other technique please do not hesitate in contacting me. I offer a free 30-minute consultation so we can discuss which program is best suited to you and your emotional health needs and goals. Get in touch to learn more and book a call.