Grief isn’t just about death – Here's how coaching can help

Grief has a way of sneaking into our lives through all sorts of doors. It doesn’t just arrive in the obvious moments – the loss of a loved one or a pet – though those are big and deeply painful. Sometimes, grief shows up when a relationship ends, when children leave home, when a job changes shape or disappears entirely. We grieve lost dreams, changing identities, places we’ve left behind, even versions of ourselves that no longer fit.

Grief, in all its forms, is part of being human, but most of us were never taught how to navigate it.

We were told to keep busy. To look on the bright side. To move on. We might even be praised for being “strong” or “getting back to normal” quickly, as though that’s the goal. But grief doesn’t work like that. It doesn’t follow a tidy five-step model. It doesn’t respect timelines or social expectations.

What coaching offers, when done well, is space. Space to pause, to breathe, to feel what’s real. To explore what’s shifted, what’s lost and what might be emerging in its place.

The many faces of grief

One of the biggest misconceptions about grief is that it’s only about bereavement. But I’ve sat with many clients – and faced it in my own life – where grief looked like:

• saying goodbye to a long-held career identity
• watching a business dream change direction or end altogether
• letting go of a future that won’t now happen
• feeling the ache of friendships drifting apart
• moving house or relocating and feeling oddly untethered
• losing health, mobility, or a sense of "normality"

These experiences don’t always get recognised by others – or even by ourselves – as grief. But the emotional weight is real. There can be sadness, anger, numbness, confusion and even relief. (Yes, grief and relief can sit side by side – and that’s OK too.)

Coaching can help make sense of those tangled feelings without needing to label them or rush to ‘fix’ them.

Coaching isn’t therapy – but it can be healing

Let’s be honest: Coaching sometimes gets a reputation for being all about goal-setting, high performance, or changing your mindset to “stay positive.” This isn't what many coaches do, especially when it comes to grief.

In coaching, we meet you where you are – even if that’s a place of stuckness, fog, or raw emotion. We hold space for the messiness. The ‘not OK-ness’. The bits you might feel you can’t say out loud anywhere else.

Good grief coaching offers compassionate challenge. Not to push you through grief, but to gently walk alongside you as you make sense of what’s shifting. To help you find new ground to stand on. To explore what still matters, even in the midst of loss.

Coaching can help with:

• naming and making sense of what you’re feeling (especially when it’s not straightforward)
• creating space to grieve in your own way – without judgement or expectations
• reconnecting with values and strengths that feel distant or buried
• finding clarity on “what now?” – even if it’s one small step at a time
• building confidence to face a changed world, or a new identity

There’s no one right way to grieve

In my own journey, I’ve learned that grief doesn’t come with a manual – and that’s both terrifying and oddly freeing.

When I lost one of my horses, Zahra – a soul companion and grounding force in my work and life – it hit me like a wave I couldn’t outrun. I watched her herd grieve too, each in their own way. Some stood vigil. Others kept their distance. Some grew quiet. Some grew closer.

It reminded me: grief is individual. And we humans are no different. Some people cry. Others go silent. Some feel numb, or angry, or guilty for not feeling more. Some throw themselves into new projects; others can’t get out of bed.

There’s no right way. Just your way. And that’s enough.

Coaching can help you find your way – gently, without pressure. It’s not about replacing therapy, and it’s not about performance. It’s about walking alongside someone who won’t try to fix you, but will be fully present with you.

The quiet magic of being heard

One of the most powerful things coaching offers is simply this: being listened to, properly. Not interrupted. Not redirected. Not judged. Not problem-solved.

In a world full of noise, that can feel quietly revolutionary.

Sometimes, clients come to a session feeling unsure of what they need, but the act of being seen and heard begins to unlock something. The grief starts to soften at the edges. New language emerges. Hope begins to flicker back into view.

It’s not magic. But it feels like it, sometimes.

Grief changes us. It leaves gaps, but it also invites us to grow around those gaps. To reshape. To reconsider what really matters.

Coaching doesn’t promise to take your grief away. But it can offer you a place to bring it, – fully, honestly – and to find your way forward at your own pace.

If you’re navigating grief in any of its forms, know this: you don’t have to do it alone. There is support that honours your experience, without rushing you to move on. Coaching can be a part of that support.

Whether your grief is recent or years old, clear-cut or complex, loud or silent, it deserves space. And so do you.