Discover the pitfalls of perfectionism

In today’s society, perfectionism is rife and sadly, many wear it as a badge of honour, making statements such as:

“I like to get things absolutely spot on, as I am a perfectionist.”

What does perfectionism look like?

People who say this may not realise that perfectionism is not always the strength it appears to be. Aiming to be perfect can be self-defeating, as perfection is an illusion.

It can keep people focused on failure, self-doubt, rejection and low self-esteem.

Your attachment to perfectionism can be a reflection of your own self-worth.

Are you constantly striving to be perfect?

Do you hear yourself saying the following?

“As I head the team up, my boss expects me to be the best at what I do.”

“My parents used to punish me if I didn’t get high grades.”

“I have really high standards, and I am not prepared to drop them.”

The difference between success and perfectionism

The pitfall of perfectionism is being constantly concerned about making mistakes, which can affect your well-being through the development in unhealthy habits.

Perfectionism can also result in low overall productivity at work, as energy is spent on lesser details than the wider picture. Many set unrealistic, rigid and inflexible goals and, when they do not achieve them, they feel they are a failure.

If this is you, then... Pause.

Let me be clear: there is a huge difference between success and perfectionism. When you make success your goal, your self-esteem rises, your confidence increases, and you feel good about yourself and achieving the goals you set.

By focusing on perfectionism, you are constantly “shoulding” yourself. If you unpack “should”, you will find it is a way of beating yourself up.

How to let go of perfectionism

You should get comfortable with accepting who you are and empower yourself by stepping more into your authentic self. This means adapting your own set of “rules” to be more flexible and adjusting your guidelines to be more adaptable.

Embrace being OK with being “perfectly imperfect” - ask yourself this question: “If I had really high self-esteem and self-confidence, what would I do?”

If perfectionism is affecting your confidence or making it difficult to move forward, a life coach can help you explore the patterns and expectations that may be holding you back. Together, you can work towards setting realistic goals, recognising your strengths and making progress without the pressure to be perfect.