How to stop comparing yourself to others

The challenge: To stop comparing yourself unfavourably to others - so much so that you knock your own confidence by comparison. 

Why comparing yourself to others can affect confidence

Look out for this popular trip wire if you are trying to restore some lost confidence. If you are comparing yourself unfavourably to those around you: friends, colleagues and even family, then you are actively undermining your own position. Also, is there really an upside to this waste of mental energy?

Finding inspiration in the achievement of others can be a great source for motivation, however, be aware this does not slip into negative comparison. This could be a very fruitful ground for weighing down your own self-confidence and is completely unnecessary.

You are unique and possess your own skills and abilities, but how can you properly concentrate on your own performance if you are busy getting anxious about how someone else is doing?

How many sprint races were lost when, instead of dipping for the finishing tape, a competitor decides instead to glance across at the competition? 

Coaching exercises to teach you to focus on your own progress

Confidence-building exercises:

Improve your own game:

• Set out a plan to enhance the things you are already good at and to challenge yourself in areas where you may need to improve.
• What new element would you like to add to your skill set? Identify it and then set about acquiring it. Like all quality and lasting personal development, it does not have to be complicated, but it's not going to be easy.

Upping your own game is where true motivation is to be found, not in watching and comparing yourself to what others are doing.

Your peers may have different strengths and weaknesses to you, so watch out for wasted energy, wishing you were like someone else.

Becoming someone else will never happen, so you're best focusing your attention on expanding your existing skill-set, or adding a tool or two to it. 

If you're not sure what your current skills are, or even where to start with something new, then a confidence coach may be a great person to speak with. We can help you assess you skills matrix, through tools such as the wheel of life, and teach you tools, strategies and methods to reach new goals that you set yourself.