A broken heart

You were not chosen. Letting go feels impossible. The notion of a forever goodbye feels like losing a part of your essence, your existence. You invested your heart and soul into this relationship, offering love that was ultimately unappreciated. Now, it seems meaningless.

Now, you are alone.

You sit with the silence. The pain. It feels a little too much.

You are no longer holding onto someone who was indifferent while you struggled to fit the pieces together.

It feels excruciating. Alien. Uncomfortable.

When the initial shock subsides, you must surrender. 

You fight it.

You enter a season of contemplation. Here, you must allow yourself to absorb the lessons from this broken heart.

But it doesn't feel nice.

Desperately, you seek distractions. Facing these thoughts is too daunting. How else can you find validation and fleeting joy? Quickly.

But here's the uncomfortable truth: true love begins at the point of surrender. It is a deeper love that nourishes you from within, a love that stands firm without external validation. This love encourages audacious authenticity, existing even when you struggle to embrace it.

As much as we try and fight it, navigating the turbulence of emotions from a breakup can reveal love's profound truth. That it comes from within.

Consider the art of surfing: resisting the wave invites nature’s humbling force. Struggle only ensures a harder fall. Wisdom lies in yielding to the wave, embracing its power, and learning to ride it with grace.

Emotions follow a similar path. Ignoring them hinders healing. It heals to sit with intense feelings to mend parts of yourself you didn't even know needed healing. Through self-inquiry, you learn to be whole and validate your own needs and desires. 

Through this, you will realise your inherent worthiness of love. Only then can you move forward with intention and peace, attracting a nourishing partnership where you feel heard and desired.

Consider my own journey. A life-shattering breakup, within ten days, drastically altered my path. I had launched a new business and was planning to relocate with my partner. Yet, with just ten days left on our lease, the relationship ended abruptly. I had to find a place to live without proof of earnings, and I was shattered. I missed the life we had built— the joy of our camper-van adventures, our mountain retreats, my easy access to the beach, and the joy of surfing that came with it.

Until I realised, I had intertwined that lifestyle with him, unnecessarily. I could create that life for myself.

So, I faced it head-on. I confronted my limiting beliefs and chose to work through them. As a result, I developed the confidence to buy my own surfboard and car (which I occasionally convert into my own camper-van!), aligning with the life I cherish. I learned to visit the beach on my own terms, dancing with the waves for my mental health. I let go.

All the reasons I stayed in an unfulfilling relationship were now validated by myself.

I discovered that I am content alone, living a life aligned with my values, needs, and desires. I know how to feel fulfilled on a Friday evening or a Sunday alone.

I learned to trust my intuition and detach from men who did not meet my needs in a romantic partner. This process made room for someone who could meet my emotional needs.

And what's even more beautiful is that as you progress on your healing journey, you learn to feel gratitude for that person. You see that beneath everyone's actions, there is love. You become grateful for the shared years, the intimate moments with that one special person among billions. And most importantly, you met someone who guided you towards this moment of self-discovery.

Gradually, you find beauty in goodbyes, understanding that they close one chapter and unveil another crucial one.

And with all this being said, it's now time for you to tell yourself a better love story, and that story begins with you.