Stories and second winds - write well, edit often

Picture the scene: you’ve just met up with a close friend you haven’t seen in a while, and you both settle down to a good old natter. You know those chats when you while away the time putting the world to rights and updating one another on the trials and tribulations of this wonderful thing we call life.

And it is wonderful because it’s the biggest story we’ll ever tell. For some of us, it’s been decades in the making, all carefully pieced together by yours truly, giving life its meaning and making us the people we are. However, do we ever stop to think about the way we tell it and pay attention to what we say?

When did you last do some editing?

I came across a fabulous quote recently: ‘Your life is your story. Write well. Edit often.’ The editing part struck me, because, in those few simple words, I found myself taking a moment to reminisce and think about my story. I realised I’m far from done and there’s still a lot of living to do!

Turning 50 a couple of years ago gave me an itch to shake things up a bit. Decade birthdays have a habit of doing that, don’t they? Besides, there’s a big wide world out there.

I also realise it’s very easy to get caught up in our own stories and convince ourselves that we can’t, we’re too old, it’s not worth it, or we’ll fail. All this chatter then becomes part of the story.

Fancy drafting a new chapter?

What does it take, then, to stop and think about how we tell our story and what it might mean? We’ve just touched on the decade birthday, but it might also be an empty nest, a loss, a yearning to find rewarding work and greater balance, or perhaps a desire to stop doing something.

Perhaps an opportunity is beckoning, but somehow you seem to talk yourself out of it rather than open yourself up to it. Perhaps you have an urge to learn something new. Or maybe you’re bored with the same old routine and fancy writing a new wish list, which could make for a very interesting chapter!

It’s strange because, when we get that torn feeling of being stuck yet wanting to break free, sometimes something appears out of nowhere. We find ourselves in editing mode, and the story suddenly shifts up a gear. In my case, it was a conversation that quite literally blew my socks off.

Hearing someone’s story can help rewrite yours

A few years ago, I was in the company of a wonderful woman. She had tutored a course I was on and kindly agreed to take part in some research I was doing at the time, so we met a few weeks later.

Fascinated by her life and work, I listened as her story unfolded. At the tender age of 56, she was about to retire when her beloved dog died. Her cat, seemingly affected by the loss, stopped eating. Saddened and very worried, she bought a new dog. Knowing it was a potentially risky move, she was amazed when the cat, quite taken with the newcomer, rallied.

With happy pets once more, she got a second wind and went on to rewrite the next two decades of her story, working and travelling internationally.

Second winds

This remarkable lady was still consulting part-time when we met, at the age of 81. At that moment, everything I had believed about life, work and retirement changed. When I think about her story, it is still as vivid as if she had told it yesterday. It is because of her that I remind myself to ‘edit often’.

What we thought was the end is just the start of the sequel

I now believe that we’re never too old, that there may still be time and that it is fine to fail while trying something new. The effort can be worthwhile; in fact, trying may already be worthwhile because it is about the way we tell our story.

I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait for that next cosy catch-up. I wonder: which parts of your story would welcome some editing? Your second wind might just appear out of nowhere.