Navigating turning 30

I’m 39 and about to turn 40. Like any milestone birthday, I’ve used it as an opportunity to set goals and establish if my life is on track. I’ve just run the London Marathon (my very first one), fostered two adorable cats and am intent on having a year of celebrations with friends and family. But looking back, what would I tell my 29-year-old self about turning 30? 

Wheel of life 

The wheel of life can be a really useful mechanism to analyse where you are in your life and which areas you’d like to focus on. Try marking each section based on how fulfilled you feel and how important it is to you. Then you will have a gap analysis to start plotting your plan. 

Life is a (hopefully) a marathon

I was very focused throughout my 20s, racing through promotions. I was very proud of everything I had achieved, but now? I’m now much more reflective about my career - focusing on culture and social impact and horizontal moves versus pure vertical ‘progression’. I broadened my role over the last few years taking on HR, as well as Marketing and also took on some voluntary work at charities. 

As you approach your milestone birthday, consider your career and what you truly want from it. If you want to progress, why do you want to progress? If you feel left behind why is that? 

With average life expectancy extending we have the opportunity to test multiple roles and have longer to get to where we want to get to. So slow down and make some time and space to think. 

Ignore social pressures 

Women in particular often have huge pressures placed on them regarding marriage and children. While biological factors are of course at play, really consider what you want from your life at this moment in time, rather than what all the movies, social media, various institutions and people around you want. 

We’re often told that women can have it all but this is fast becoming a myth as we realise it’s near impossible to juggle being a caregiver, having a career as well as being responsible for all the housework. Make sure you find the right partner for life (if that’s what you want) rather than rushing into a relationship where the load isn’t shared. Really think about the relationship you deserve. 

Look after yourself 

Our bodies are our homes. While I don’t regret for a moment all the amazing times I had partying in my 20s, my 30s have certainly been a time of prioritising my health. I found an amazing nutritionist and eat more fruit and veg than I ever have. I’ve made exercise a habit I love by taking part in organised events. And I spend lots of time doing meditation and yoga. 

Be across your finances 

Many women are afraid of finances and leave it to the men in their lives. Perhaps it’s the way we were taught maths at school or the lack of STEM role models which makes maths feel inaccessible for many. But much like taking the bins out, it’s really not that hard once you get your head around it. If you haven’t already, I’d recommend seeking advice from a financial advisor so that you know your numbers! 

Select your social circle 

Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you. That doesn’t mean not listening to people outside of your eco chamber and not being open to accepting valuable feedback. But it does mean that there are toxic people in the world who drain our positivity. Banish them if you can or spend as little time as possible with them. 

Relax 

While turning 30 can be a great moment of reflection, age really is just a number. I don’t feel old as such - and I’m not sure you ever do. I wish I had relaxed more throughout my life and let things wash over me sometimes. As an old boss used to tell me, enjoy the journey, not just the destination.