It's never too late to change
People say that ‘I can’t change.’ ‘I am who I am.’ ‘Leopards can’t change their spots.’ Well, it might be true about the leopard, but is it true about you?
Are you the same person when you were a baby, a teenager, at Uni, in your thirties, forties, sixties, in your career? The world changes, friends change, life can be a roller coaster, a bed of roses, and we change with it.
Who you are and what you know at six, is rather different from what you know at 60.
Change is sometimes small and you hardly notice. You live with you, so it is difficult to see what changes day by day, month by month. When I first discovered NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) and started training after my first course, I was truly fascinated and interested by it all, but I was learning and experiencing much of the training and techniques, but I didn’t realise I was changed by the experience.
However, my partner certainly did notice. He saw that I had altered; I was more confident, open and outgoing. How could I not see that? I suppose because the changes occurred over several months I didn't notice. And it didn’t hurt! In fact the difference was amazing, and all the realisations I encountered on the way.
The other thing I learnt was that you can change your thinking. ‘That’s who I am’ simply doesn’t cut it. You can get up in the morning, the day looks grey, things don’t bode well and then a friends rings up ‘how about coffee?’ Or a cheque arrives in the post, a former colleague rings offering you an amazing opportunity, your child says something that makes you laugh. And suddenly the world looks brighter, the birds are singing; the world has changed.
It all sounds simple, but as with so many things it is really quite complex. These are small examples, for we are complex people with different experiences, memories, families, with thoughts and fears that run deep.
A six year old child’s understanding of an event can be very different to an adult’s. Yet it is that understanding and then belief that is formed from that time, that we might have carried with us for decades. And because of that belief it could have impeded our progress in our career, relationships, general happiness and even health.
However, it is encouraging to know that you can change things. You don’t change the memories, you change your perception and interpretation of them.
So it is possible to change. And a leopard might even be able to change its spots.
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