Just say NO
Sometimes, the most effective word you can use is just a simple and firm ‘no’ on its own. For example, if your young toddler thinks that it is a fun game to empty the contents of your purse onto the table or throw their dinner on the floor then there is not much point in ‘disciplining’. A child who is very young won’t understand the connection between the naughty deed and the punishment you issue (for example confiscating a favourite toy), so in cases such as these ‘no’ will convey your message.
It’s an age-old technique but in many cases it can be effective to give both you and your child a calm down period after an incident. A few minutes in a specific area should suffice. For example on a chair or on the bottom step of the stairs. Applying a general rule of one minute for each year of a child’s age is a good guideline, as leaving a child for too long could result in them forgetting why they were put there in the first place.
Turn down the volume
It’s easy and instinctive to shout when you feel harassed or stressed, but bear in mind the fact that this reaction is often completely ineffective. Research has shown that many children tune out or act suspiciously in a bid to avoid their parent’s wrath, proving that shouting is not the way.
All you need to do is make a request a maximum of twice, and if they don’t cooperate then you will need to follow up with a consequence.
Bringing up children can be extremely challenging (although very fulfilling), and if you are struggling you shouldn’t be afraid to ask for help. If you are feeling overwhelmed by your responsibilities or you are simply struggling to communicate with and discipline your children then a parent coach may provide the solution. Visit our Parent Coaching fact-sheet today to find out more.
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