The awesomeness of being you!

I remember many times in my life when I felt I needed to pretend to be someone I wasn’t - particularly at work - but being anything other than yourself can feel like a pressure cooker. The steam builds and builds until finally the lid can’t hold it anymore and we blow!

This can happen when we feel we constantly have to hide or change parts of ourselves to fit in. We can keep it up for a while, but eventually it can become difficult to maintain.

Our fear of being seen for who we really are can hold us back - we fear criticism, so the sooner we accept that we won’t be liked by everyone, the sooner we can feel freer to be ourselves.

It’s OK to be you - with your opinions and your beliefs. Not everyone will agree with you, but that doesn’t automatically make you wrong - sometimes it’s simply a difference of opinion.

Let go of the need to be liked by everyone

Not everyone will connect with you, and differences in personality, values or expectations can all play a part. That doesn't automatically mean there is something wrong with you, but it can still be useful to remain open to thoughtful feedback.

Don’t be ashamed to be you. You don't need to be perfect to accept and respect who you are. Your experiences, including mistakes and setbacks, can all contribute to who you are and what you've learned.

Being you allows you to show your passion. Being more authentic can make it easier for other people to understand what you stand for and decide whether they connect with you, your work or your message.

You won’t connect with everyone, and that’s OK. The aim doesn't have to be universal approval, but to build relationships with people who value and respect what you bring.

Be honest about who you are

It's much nicer to build a business and a life around being authentically you. So don’t be scared to say how it is for you. If you write blogs or broadcasts, be honest - people can connect with stories.

I speak from my heart. I tell people how it really is for me. On occasion I could cringe at some of the things that come out of my mouth - and I do! But it doesn’t last. I realise it’s me - take it or leave it.

I’m not perfect, and I don’t claim to be, but I’ve learned some things, and if you can take value from them, then that’s important.

Sharing appropriate personal experiences honestly can sometimes help other people relate to you. You can share your difficulties, breakthroughs and successes without pretending that you've always had everything worked out.

Don’t feel that you have to be a guru. You don't have to present yourself as someone who has all the answers. Sharing what you've learned, including some of the difficulties you've experienced, can make your message feel more human.

We don’t need to change everybody’s life. Sometimes simply sharing an experience or something you've learned can be useful to somebody who recognises part of their own situation in yours.

Stories of people overcoming setbacks can be powerful because they remind us that difficulties don't necessarily have to be the end of the story.

It’s OK to make mistakes. Mistakes and setbacks are a normal part of trying new things, learning and working towards something that matters.

Know what you stand for

Being authentic doesn't mean your views can never change. It means being honest about what you think and value now, while remaining open to learning.

When you are yourself, you can say how it is for you. You can become more comfortable owning your views without needing every other person to agree with them.

Get clear about your values and what you stand for. When you keep consistency in your message, you can build trust - people have a clearer idea of what matters to you and what they can expect from you.

We all have life experience which may be of value to others and will probably affect what we feel strongly about. So share what you've learned from your own experiences when it feels useful. You may not always know when something you've shared has been useful or meaningful to somebody else.

Bring your personality into your work

In business, being clear about your own values, personality and approach can also help distinguish you from others offering something similar. Think about what makes you different and how you can communicate that to others.

Being clear about who you are and how you work can help potential clients or colleagues decide whether your approach is right for them.

Always focus on your qualities - what are you good at? If your friends were asked what’s great about you, what would they say? Then think about how you can use those personality traits and strengths to your advantage.

So why try to become a second-rate version of somebody else when you can become more comfortable being a first-rate version of yourself?