How sensory language can improve communication

Have you ever wondered why the person you’re speaking to doesn’t seem to understand what you’re saying, or, from a coaching perspective, what you’re asking? It might be partly down to the fact that you’re not speaking in a way that connects with how they naturally process information.

Understanding this can support communication, as human beings process information by using the five senses: seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling and tasting. Some people may lean more towards visual language, while others may naturally use words linked to sound, feeling or experience.

Once aware of this, you can begin to notice the language someone uses and adapt the way you speak to support their understanding.

Jill: “I feel like he’s not in touch with his team.”

Mike: “I hear what you’re saying. We seem to be on the same wavelength, but how do we get him to listen?”

Jill is using feeling-based language, whereas Mike is using hearing-based language.

Here are some commonly heard conversational clues that may show which language people feel comfortable using.

Seeing or visual language

• I get the picture.
• See what I mean.
• That is colourful, coming from you.
• Show me what you mean.
• We’ll look back on this someday.

Hearing or auditory language

• Sounds good to me.
• Clear as a bell.
• I just turned a deaf ear to…
• I hear what you say.
• Ah, that’s music to my ears.

Feeling, tactile or kinaesthetic language

• I feel good about this.
• He’ll get the sharp end of my tongue.
• I cannot get a grip on this.
• I felt right at home.
• The pressure to complete was incredible.

Smelling or olfactory language

• This smells fishy.
• I smell a rat.
• As sweet as a rose.
• He had a nose for which direction to go.

Tasting or gustatory language

• Let us chew it over.
• Like eating a piece of cake.
• It left a nasty taste.
• She’s so sweet.

Although the last two are less common, you may still hear them in everyday phrases.

Exercise

As fast as you can, using the answer that immediately feels right for you, choose one from each of the three options given in the sections below.

I like to learn by...

• Seeing how to do it.
• Hearing a talk.
• Having a go, hands-on.

I make decisions by...

• Getting a clear picture.
• Finding out how it sounds.
• Attending to my gut feeling.

I buy things based on...

• Colour, style and appearance.
• Its description, sound or the salesperson’s talk.
• The feel of the thing.

I find it easier to...

• Draw a picture.
• Sing or hum a tune.
• Play sport.

By opting mainly for the first statement, you may have a preference for visual language.

Selecting the middle option may suggest an auditory preference.

The third option may indicate a kinaesthetic preference.

Life coaches may use this as one way to listen more closely and reframe questions in a style that resonates with the client. Communication can improve when we listen first, notice the language being used and adapt our own language where helpful. This can offer more clarity and increase the likelihood that your words will be understood.