What is self-love?

Self-love is the key to your growth and evolution. Self-love allows you to be more tolerant of life’s frustrations, allowing you to create close connections and an attractive personality. Self-love is the most important factor if you want to live a happy and satisfying life.

But what really is self-love and how do we achieve it?


Here are 22 components of self-love:

1. Self-acceptance

A sense of comfort and ease with yourself whereby you accept all that you are; your strengths, weaknesses and an understanding that you are of a ‘unique worth’.

2. Self-appreciation

Acknowledgement, recognition and admiration of your individual, unique qualities.

3. Self-awareness

A clear understanding of your personality, strengths, weaknesses, qualities and flaws. The more self-aware you are, the easier it is to understand and relate to others.

4. Self-care

Looking after yourself. Taking care of your physical, spiritual, emotional and mental health. Increasing your well-being through self-care behaviours.

5. Self-compassion

Being gentle, empathetic and showing kindness to oneself. Being understanding to your current situation.

6. Self-confidence

The degree to which you like yourself and are willing to challenge yourself. Your self-confidence is the positive image you have of yourself.

7. Self-empowerment

The power within oneself to take full responsibility for your life and by taking action to create it. The power over your perceptions, the power over how you react to situations, and the power to do what is necessary for your own self-growth.

8. Self-assurance

The extent to which you are in control of your life.

9. Self-worth

The degree to which you value yourself. Self-worth can only be self-generated by having a high opinion of yourself.

10 Self-esteem

The degree to which you rate yourself and hold yourself in high regard.

11. Self-belief

The degree to which you believe deep inside that you are worthy and deserving of the good things that you are about to bring into your life.

12. Positive self-image

Feel good about yourself, having a positive image of how you view yourself.

13. Self-honesty

Unwavering commitment to the truth about yourself and how your actions, thoughts, and choices affect your life and the people around you.

14. Self-forgiveness

The degree to which you clear out negative self-judgement and negative self-criticism. Remembering that you are human and will always make mistakes, which is all part of the learning process.

Allow yourself to let go of the past hurts and disappointments when you felt that you let yourself down. Recognise that, perhaps, you didn’t have access to the resources, knowledge, or the support you needed when you made the decisions which hurt you.

15. Self-trust

The ability to look inside yourself for the answer. The confidence you have in your inner voice, inner knowing, and inner feeling or image your inner wisdom shows you.

16. Self-respect

Making choices that honour your soul, having pride in oneself and behaving with dignity.

17. Self-pleasure

Consistently choosing to create opportunities to allow yourself to receive and experience play, pleasure and fun. Inviting opportunities for happiness and feeding your soul with joy.

18. Self-expression

Allowing yourself the freedom of expression, being unapologetic, allowing the real you to shine.

19. Self-resilience

The ability to rely absolutely and totally on yourself. To be the master of your own life. “Self-reliance is the single universal quality that truly successful individuals share” - Fiona Harrold.

20. Self-honour

To worship yourself and having integrity in one self’s beliefs and actions.

21. Self-realisation

The ability to distinguish the real (true self), from the unreal (the ego). ‘Fulfilment by oneself of the possibilities of one’s character or personality’.

22. Self-approval

Liberation! No need to wait for others’ approval or the feeling of having to prove yourself. Accepting who you are and where you are now. Appreciating and being in agreement with yourself.

If life is not working for you, or you are finding it difficult getting and maintaining satisfying relationships with others then you may be lacking in one of the areas of self-love shown above.

If this is the case then maybe it’s time to work on strengthening those areas of self-love you are lacking in and change your life for the better. Working with a coach can help you to do this. To find a coach in your local area, use our advanced search tool. Simply pop in your postcode to browse professionals near you.

For more help and advice, read ‘Eight key signs that you are lacking in self-love’.

Life Coach Directory is not responsible for the articles published by members. The views expressed are those of the member who wrote the article.

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Written by Ayesha Giselle Dornelly

Hi, I'm Ayesha Giselle, Life and Accountability Coach. I help you to become who you need to be today, so that you can become the person you want to be tomorrow.
Action taking, change-seeking individuals turn to me when they want to rise above the pressures and struggles of their hectic days and design a life overflowing with success and fulfilment.
Working with me is simple…Read more

Written by Ayesha Giselle Dornelly

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