How to stop feeding your anxiety

Where does anxiety come from? What even is anxiety? Most of us have felt it at some point – but the real question is, why?

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Anxiety isn’t who you are – it’s what you’ve learned to feel. And with understanding, you can learn to feel differently.

Sometimes, anxiety shows up as a short-term reaction to stress – a natural response to feeling under pressure. But even when it’s short-lived, the physical symptoms can feel overwhelming:

  • a racing heart
  • tight chest
  • nausea
  • brain fog
  • emotional overload

It’s scary. It feels like something is seriously wrong – even when, deep down, you know it might not be. This is where anxiety plays its cruel trick: it makes you believe something awful is coming… even when nothing is.

Then there’s a deeper level of anxiety – the kind that lingers, day in and day out. This is known as generalised anxiety disorder (GAD). It’s not just a reaction to one event; it’s a background hum of fear, “what ifs,” and constant overthinking. And often, it doesn’t begin in adulthood – it begins in childhood.

If you grew up in an emotionally unsafe, toxic, or unpredictable environment, your nervous system may have been trained to be on high alert. You may have learned to expect the worst, brace yourself, or stay small just to stay safe.

Children absorb everything as truth. Before age seven, we don’t yet have the ability to analyse or filter what’s happening around us – we internalise it. If fear or instability were present in your childhood, those feelings may have become part of your emotional blueprint.

But anxiety isn’t only environmental. It can also be passed down through epigenetics, meaning emotional trauma, fear, or grief experienced by your ancestors can be biologically inherited. If your family endured hardship, loss, or emotional suppression, you may be carrying emotional patterns that don’t even belong to you.


Mental clarity: The breakthrough you deserve

Mental clarity means being able to see your thoughts clearly, without being overwhelmed by them. It’s the space between reaction and response. It’s the calm behind the chaos. And it’s absolutely possible – even if you’ve lived with anxiety for years.

Getting mental clarity isn’t about “thinking positively” or pretending anxiety doesn’t exist. It’s about understanding what’s really going on inside your mind and body – and working with it, not against it.

So many of my clients come to me saying:

  • “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
  • “I feel like I can’t switch off.”
  • “My brain just doesn’t stop.”

But there is nothing wrong with you. You’re not broken. You’re just stuck in an outdated pattern, and you’ve never been taught how to change it. That’s where coaching comes in.

 Coaches may use a blend of:

  • NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) to help rewire unhelpful thought patterns.
  • CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) to challenge beliefs and behaviours.
  • Life coaching to inspire motivation and direction.
  • Counselling to safely explore emotional wounds.
  • Hypnotherapy to access the subconscious and calm the nervous system.

This approach isn’t one-size-fits-all – it’s tailored to you. Together, you'll explore the root causes of your anxiety and help you build powerful tools to manage it.

I believe that education is key. When you understand how anxiety works – how it’s formed, why it sticks, and how your mind is feeding it – everything changes. Awareness gives you power. It gives you choice.

You learn how to:

  • catch your anxious thoughts early
  • stop fuelling the fear
  • reframe your beliefs
  • soothe your nervous system
  • regain confidence and calm

How to stop feeding the fear

Anxiety feeds on repetition. Every time you dwell, ruminate, or catastrophise, you're reinforcing the same loop. But when you question your thoughts, you weaken their power.

Try asking:

  • Is this thought 100% true?
  • What’s the evidence for and against it?
  • Is this belief mine, or something I was taught?
  • What would I say to a friend thinking this way?

When you meet anxious thoughts with curiosity instead of fear, you start to gain control. And when you pair that with daily practices like grounding, breathwork, reframing, and subconscious work, your mind begins to follow your lead.

But consistency is everything.

You can’t dip in and out of healing. Your mind needs repetition and reassurance to rewire old patterns.

Every day you choose calm over fear, you’re teaching your nervous system a new way to be. That’s how change happens.

You are not your anxiety. You are your awareness

Anxiety may be part of your story, but it doesn’t have to be the whole book. With the right support, you can:

  • understand yourself deeply
  • work with your mind, not against it
  • learn how your past shaped you
  • rebuild confidence and clarity
  • move from surviving to thriving

If you feel you'd benefit from professional support, reach out to an anxiety coach to start your journey towards mental clarity. 

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This article was written with AI-assisted technologies and has been reviewed and edited with human oversight, in accordance with our AI policy.

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The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Life Coach Directory. Articles are reviewed by our editorial team and offer professionals a space to share their ideas with respect and care.

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