12 tips for starting university

So, you or your child is starting university in September? The gap year that seemed as though it was going to go on forever is quickly coming to an end, and there are book lists to be printed out and wardrobes to be assessed!

Some things stay the same. You might need new shoes the way you always did for the autumn term, although you are less likely to be buying these from Clarks with your mum there to ask you to walk up and down in them. You'll still be buying stationery for the new term, but let's face it, your pencil case is a bit less likely to have ‘Hello Kitty’ or ‘Danger Mouse’ on it.

Some things are going to be different. You are going to be steering your own way in life, perhaps more than you ever have, and so here are some tips that are a little different from the usual ones that tell you to buy a cheap kettle for your bedroom and make sure you go to Freshers’ Week.

1. Remember that it is not necessarily the case that the friends you make during Freshers’ Week will be your friends throughout your time at university. Don't worry if you tag along with a group and it turns out not to be the best fit for you. You are allowed to change your friend choices.
2. Suss out student accommodation and choose it carefully. If you need a bit more support to begin with, it may be better to live in halls of residence.
3. Get into good habits now. The YouTube channel College Info Geek has some great ideas on this. For example, if you get into a good sleep and exercise routine, you can carry that with you into your time at uni. You can track habits using an app like Habitica.
4. If you haven't already, educate yourself about the risks associated with excessive drinking and drugs so that, if you are ever tempted, you can make an informed choice.
5. Familiarise yourself with the outline of your course and check whether there is any preparatory reading to do. In any case, if you have been on a gap year, practise reading something that is a bit more like the books you will be studying to lessen the intellectual shock of going from Hello! magazine to History of the 20th Century. If your course choice starts to fill you with dread, you need to work out whether that is just fear of the new or whether you really have made the wrong choice. If you have made the wrong choice, explore your options with the university.
6. Keep in touch with your friends from B.U. (before uni). It can be helpful to check in with them about their experiences of navigating this new life stage.
7. Realise that this is a huge life-stage change, and big changes can bring up a lot of emotional gunk. Everything you knew before can seem like it has gone out of the window. The mantra for this period of change is: ‘I haven't a clue what is going on, and that's OK.’ Don't worry, this stage doesn't last forever.
8. Trust your intuition. When making choices, think to yourself: ‘Does this feel like diving into a pool of clear blue water, or does it feel like diving into a pool of sludge?’
9. Consider what your instincts are telling you alongside the practical information available.
10. Keep in touch with your parents. I know you are trying to establish yourself in this new life stage. The thing to remember is that it's also a huge life stage for your parents. You are their baby bird, and you are flying the nest, which can be tough for them. You'll know whether this is the case for you; it's not the case for everyone.  Your relationship is going to exist far beyond your time at uni, and even a short call will help to reassure them that you're OK.
11. Pick the modules, Students’ Union activities and societies that light you up.
    If you need help with beliefs about yourself, you might want to work with a life coach. You might have beliefs about not being clever enough, needing to struggle through things, others being better than you, or not having enough time...
    All sorts of beliefs can get in the way of making your time at university a success. Working with a coach can help you to start believing better stories about yourself.
12. Use ‘the three Bs’ to avoid overwhelm: 

• What can you bag (not do)?
• What can you barter (get someone else to do)?
• What can you better (all the ways you can make a task you are not keen on a better experience for yourself)?

You are about to embark on a huge adventure and one that I hope you will be able to use to plant the seeds of your life beyond uni and look back on happily.

It's important to enjoy the days of summer, but you can do a great deal to prepare yourself mentally, physically and emotionally for the new challenges that are coming.