Signals work-life balance is out of balance

‘You want something done, ask a busy woman.’

High performers can sometimes find it hard to notice when the pace they’re maintaining is starting to take its toll. After all, they are used to putting the work in, getting on with it and not putting up with anything that gets in their way. That’s one of the reasons they are doing so well. They are often seen as reliable, highly productive and efficient.

Let’s consider Anna, 36, who lives in Greater London. She is building a successful city career, is an engaged mum of her twin boys, a lovely wife and organiser of the lives of all her family members. She is also a great friend, loves exercise and never misses a party. Looking at her life is tiring for just an onlooker.

Superwoman

Anna seems the superwoman beyond belief. And she was. Until recently. Because her intense lifestyle is catching up with her energy levels. What seemed to work for years has become an effort. What seemed to be joy has become a burden.

What is going on?

Anna is feeling emotionally drained and starting to run on empty.

Something about the way she’s living no longer seems to be working for her.

What are Anna’s signals that things are not OK?

• She doesn’t sleep well. Wakes up in the middle of the night and worries.
• She forgets things. Last week she didn’t attend the meeting at school as it had slipped her mind.
• She is snappy. She was always easy-going, until recently.
• She feels resentful. She knows she is juggling a lot of balls. It never bothered her that others had chosen a more relaxed lifestyle, but now it is an irritating issue.
• She finds herself trying to control more. As she feels she is losing control, she puts in a huge effort to hold on to control.
• She starts to doubt her abilities. As more things begin to slip, it undermines her confidence.
• She lacks energy. Where she used to be this ‘tiger’, who was up for everything and couldn’t get enough of life, she is tired. Or better said: exhausted.

If you recognise changes like these in yourself, it may be worth paying attention to them rather than simply pushing through. Consider what could help you create more space, rest or balance before things become increasingly difficult to manage.