Do you live your life according to your values?
Have you ever considered why some of the people you count among your best friends often have completely different tastes in music, clothes and activities than yourself? Yet you feel a connection and the friendship bond remains through thick and thin?
It is said that opposites attract so what is the key to such lasting relationships?
One of the areas coaches frequently explore with clients is to look at their key values and whether these figure in their personal and working lives.
Values are not to be confused with beliefs; beliefs are what we consider to be true, whether or not they are in reality. What we believe is important in every aspect of life-our lives and the lives of others.
On the other hand values can be seen as our 'personal code of ethics', our 'raison d'etre'. Values provide us with motivation and direction to complete tasks or challenge certain situations.
Going back to my first question as to why we choose to be friendly with certain people and not others; it's most likely that YOUR key values will be similar to those of your friends and partner.
So, if you are not too sure what your key values are, here's an activity which might produce some surprises:
- Make a list of six to 10 values that are important to you. (These are intangible so if, for example you value your family, consider what your family gives you security? Happiness? Love? Choose the one value that sums up family for you).
- Now put your values in order of priority; number one being the most important and the last number the least important.
- Now decide which of these values is THE most important.
- Finally, ask yourself if your key value(s) feature in your daily working and personal life.
The chances are, if you adopt values which go against your own personal 'code of ethics,' you will probably be feeling dissatisfied and not living life to the full.
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Caroline Wellingham - Accredited Career and Life Coach, NLP PractitionerJuly 12th, 2017