Five ways to be more content
Rocking the charts at the moment is 'Shallow' by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper.
Tell me somethin', girl
Are you happy in this modern world?
Or do you need more?
Is there somethin' else you're searchin' for?
Tell me something, boy
Aren't you tired tryin' to fill that void?
Or do you need more?
Ain't it hard keepin' it so hardcore?
It's interesting that the last three songs I heard on the radio all refer to the same malaise, discontentment or fractiousness that people are feeling inside. Most of the time it is very doable to change circumstances that are causing discontent. Sometimes, though, you just have to deal with life as it is, live with the result of decisions you have made, or come to terms with the hand you have been dealt. And yes, sometimes life does suck.
So how do you become more content with life at the moment? Here are five suggestions. Give them a go - what have you got to lose?
Change your mindset
- Every morning, before you even get out of bed, think of three things you are grateful for. This will help start your mind off in a positive manner.
- Around dinner time, share with friends or family, or on social media, the best thing about the day. Start a social media challenge '#grateful for' and nominate someone else to do it every week.
Get in control of your thought life
- Catch yourself when muttering about others or when feeling self-critical, and stop. Now think of something positive about yourself or someone else.
- When the grass looks greener, plan ways you can water your own backyard.
Surrender control of people or circumstances
- Name the area or person you are trying to control. Ask yourself truthfully - is it worth my concern? Is it really mine to control or is it something I need to trust someone else with? Do I need to let go? There is a big difference between surrendering control and relinquishing responsibility. Every time the issue clutches you, remember that you have surrendered control. Own the release this can bring.
Build yourself up by doing little things that make you feel good about yourself
- We tend to remember the insults and forget nice things people say about us. Write down compliments you have been given and keep them to hand where you can see them – from a boss, friend, teacher, partner, child, a parent – anything that makes you know you are wanted, valued, appreciated or loved.
- Take daily pride in your appearance. When you look good, you feel good. What do you need to do each morning to face the world and walk a bit taller?
Come to terms with your current circumstances
- All of us have been rejected more than once. All of us have made mistakes. We have been turned down for jobs, lost out in love, said or done things we shouldn’t have, or just been in the wrong place at the wrong time. It's important to spend time processing and forgiving so you don’t remain frozen, stuck or become bitter. James R Sherman wrote the quote below in his book 'How to Survive Rejection'. It’s relevant not just when facing rejection but about any circumstance, you are struggling to come to terms with. “First of all, you have to accept the fact that your rejection is over and done with. There’s nothing you can do now to change what has already happened. If you spend time worrying about it, you’ll lose sight of the present and stumble into a cloudy future. You can’t go back and make a new start, but you can start right now and make a brand new ending.”
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About Jenny Butter
Jenny Butter is an Accredited Senior Coach. All clients give consistently excellent and exciting feedback. Jenny offers face to face and online coaching; during the day, in the evening and on Saturday morning. Previous clients have spanned six continents, youth to retired, and come from all walks of life.