What is emotional resilience?

Emotional resilience means the ability to acclimate to stressful situations, hardships or crises in life. This capability varies from person to person, depending on their innate emotional strength, childhood experiences and awareness of healthy coping mechanisms (Scott, 2020).

Who can we call an emotionally resilient person?

Now, what kind of traits does an emotionally resilient person possess? An emotionally resilient person is often self-reflective and able to identify an issue in the first place. This might happen through a mindfulness approach to daily tasks, regular journaling, or simply observing the physiological changes in the body, such as increased blood pressure, stomachache, or muscle tension, for example.

Then, instead of pushing those thoughts and feelings away or acting upon them impulsively, such a person takes time to embrace them, which can be done through a variety of ways, including breathwork activities, writing something down, or simply letting it be, instead of suppressing the uncomfortable feeling.

Since the newest research finds that emotion itself lasts for about 90 seconds, it is the narrative we attach to it that prevails longer and causes emotional suffering (Balasubramanian, 2021). Building on this, we can recognise a scientific confirmation of a very old Buddhist concept of anicca (impermanence), which teaches us that the most indisputable truth about the world is its changeability and transience. In the light of this wisdom, the lack of acceptance of reality and unconstructive attachment (inability to let certain things go) is the main cause of emotional suffering. (Britannica, 2024)

An emotionally intelligent person acknowledges that and lets the feeling stream through them, without being reactive. Just like the Holocaust-survivor and acclaimed therapist Viktor Frankl edifies us in his famous quote: "Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom". 

How to enhance your emotional resilience

As highlighted above, an emotionally resilient person can approach difficulties with calmness and self-awareness, noticing their emotional response, observing sensations coming from the body. and apply suitable strategies that worked in the past.

Resilience is a skill like any other and can be trained and mastered. It can happen through strong communities, effective parenting and supportive school environments. In adult life, we can turn to a specialist to look for professional help through workshops, support groups or well-being coaching sessions.

What works depends on the individual's needs and preferences; however, there are plenty of ways to support this important element of mental health – emotional resilience.

For some people, it is vital to seek support from others – whether that be families, friends, or professionals, such as counsellors, when facing adversities. For others, it is crucial to spend some time in nature or surrounded by beauty and art in places like museums and art galleries. Many people find it helpful to engage in social activities, such as local clubs and interest groups. This is especially important considering that research highlights the importance of strong interpersonal relationships and being a member of a supportive community (NIMH, 2024).

Sport is also invariably one of the best ways to release tension and serves as a natural mood stabiliser. There is a plethora of research on how having a pet, reading a book, establishing healthy sleep patterns, and nutritious meals can also help to lower blood pressure levels and support the ability to cope with difficult feelings (Mayo Clinic, 2024).

Tap into the ancient wisdom

Let's also mention certain additional traits, skills and approaches that increase well-being and therefore, emotional resilience. Here, we can mention the ability to stay present and lean towards a more positive attitude. In order to achieve that, a gratitude practice might be of help. Additionally, following the Latin maxim carpe diem – "seize the day" – which simply means staying in the moment, and not ruminating over the past, or worrying about the future, may help. Another piece of advice from the ancient philosophers is the Stoic concept of the 'dichotomy of control', which refers to the capacity to recognise what is and is not within our control (Hadot, 1993).

Finally, let us not forget about the very basic elements of a healthy mind – taking care of the body. Another Latin quote, "mens sana in corpore sano" (a healthy mind in a healthy body), reminds us of the importance of a body and mind balance. 

One step at a time

In conclusion, we should emphasise the fact that we do not need to incorporate all those strategies at once in order to enhance our ability to deal with daily struggles. Quite the opposite, since that would be quite a taxing and overwhelming project. The best way is to simply start by noticing what and who nourishes us mentally, and what, in contrast, drains us of energy and emotional capacity to joyously engage with the world.