Postpartum wellness: gentle steps to feeling like yourself again

Becoming a mum is one of the most profound transitions we go through. It reshapes our identity, our routines, our priorities and often the way we look after our own wellbeing.

As a health and wellness coach, my work centres around behaviour change and helping people create meaningful, long-lasting shifts in their health. My core philosophy is simple: joy over restriction.

Now, as a new mum myself, this philosophy feels more relevant than ever.

Small moments of self-care can feel truly transformative during the postpartum period, yet they can also feel incredibly difficult to access. When so much of your time and energy is suddenly focused on another person, the things you used to do to look after yourself can quickly disappear.

So how do we start bringing some of them back without creating even more pressure?

I want to share some practical strategies that helped me gently reconnect with my own wellbeing and that can be used in coaching for other mums who want to feel more like themselves again.

Let’s talk about the all-or-nothing mindset

Many new mums feel frustrated that they can’t get back into their previous routines, and that frustration can quickly lead to an all-or-nothing mentality.

If I can’t do a full workout, there’s no point. I’ll wait until life is less chaotic to start again. I don’t have enough time to meditate properly, so I won’t bother.

I hear this often, and I’ve experienced it myself.

Before becoming a mum, I meditated for 10 minutes every morning. It grounded me and was something I rarely missed. After my daughter was born, those quiet mornings quickly disappeared, and I had to rethink what that ritual could look like in this new season of my life.

One of the biggest lessons for me was realising that we don’t need the full version of a habit to experience its benefits. In fact, holding onto the idea that something only counts if we can do it exactly as we did before can be the very thing stopping us from doing it at all.

Create the five-minute version of what you used to love

Think about one small ritual that helped you feel grounded or simply more like yourself before having your baby.

Was it reading before bed? Having a morning coffee in silence? Going to the gym? Meditating? Getting outside for a walk? Spending time getting ready in the morning?

Now think about what the five-minute version of that habit could look like and when you might realistically be able to fit it into your current day.

For me, meditation became simply taking a few intentional breaths before getting out of bed.

On some days, even that wasn’t possible, so I’d take those breaths while rocking my child or while she napped on me. I experimented with meditating during naps, before bedtime and at different points throughout the day.

It wasn’t perfect, but it was enough to help me feel connected to myself again.

Try this with something you miss for two weeks. Let it be flexible. Your only goal is to show up, not perfectly, just consistently.

Treat it as an experiment. Notice what works, what doesn’t and what you might adjust. Motherhood can be unpredictable, so your wellbeing routines need to have some flexibility built into them too.

Start smaller than you think

A major theme in my coaching practice is starting smaller than feels necessary.

This can feel counterintuitive, especially when you’re desperate to get back to your old routines, but starting small gives you something incredibly valuable: the opportunity to succeed.

When we set ourselves goals that require the perfect circumstances, it becomes much harder to follow through. And perfect circumstances can be particularly difficult to find with a baby.

A small action gives you the opportunity to practise showing up consistently and to start rebuilding trust in yourself. Instead of focusing on what you used to be able to do, focus on what feels realistic for your life right now. You can always build from there.

Think differently about the time you have

Postpartum undeniably comes with less available time, and I don’t believe it’s helpful to pretend otherwise. But sometimes, there are small pockets of time that automatically get filled with household jobs, scrolling or other things we feel we should be doing.

One practical thing you can try is occasionally allowing the housework to wait for five minutes while you do something that nourishes you instead.

Have the coffee while it’s hot. Sit outside. Stretch. Read a few pages of your book. Put on a song you love. Call a friend.

The dishes will still be there afterwards.

This isn’t about squeezing productivity out of every spare five minutes. It’s actually the opposite. It’s about recognising that some of those minutes can belong to you too.

Remember that wellness is holistic

When we talk about postpartum wellness, it’s very easy for the conversation to focus solely on food and exercise. But true wellbeing is so much broader than that.

It can be feeling supported in your relationships, enjoying your home environment, having time for creativity or hobbies, connecting with friends, looking after your emotional health, or simply experiencing moments of joy and personal fulfilment.

Sometimes the thing that makes you feel most like yourself again has absolutely nothing to do with a workout or what you ate that day.

And when these other areas of our wellbeing are being supported, some of the more traditional health habits can start to feel easier and more approachable too.

And yes, you also deserve time alone

Alongside finding ways to weave wellbeing into everyday life, I also believe it’s important to have genuine, uninterrupted time for yourself.

I know how challenging this can be, both practically and emotionally.

Asking for help or accepting support can feel uncomfortable, particularly if you’re used to being independent or worry about being a burden to other people.

If this is something you struggle with, ask yourself: what would I need regularly to feel good if guilt wasn’t part of the equation? Once you have an answer, start small.

Take the time even if it initially feels uncomfortable. Leave the house if you can. Do something that has nothing to do with being productive. Try not to spend the whole time checking your phone or worrying about what’s happening at home.

Like any new habit, it might take practice.

Finding wellness in this new season

Getting back to wellness postpartum doesn’t have to mean getting back to the exact person or routine you had before becoming a mum. Your life has changed, so it makes sense that the way you look after yourself might need to change too.

Start with what feels achievable now. Find the five-minute version. Let things be imperfect. Experiment with what works and allow yourself to change it when it doesn’t.

Most importantly, remember that looking after yourself doesn’t have to come from restriction, pressure or another list of things you should be doing.

There should be room for joy too.

If you’re navigating the postpartum period and struggling to find time for practices that feel nourishing and connect you back to yourself, this is where working with a coach could be beneficial. 

Coaching provides the headspace to think about what you need to feel your best and the framework to help you build that back into your lifestyle in a manageable way.