Picture this...

Sometimes we have an idea, or something that we really want to achieve, in business or otherwise, but we just can’t seem to get it off the ground because we feel blocked. There’s just something in the way- an inner obstacle.

Often, this can be linked to earlier experiences. For instance, it could be that even though you got A grades most of the time, the one B grade you got was picked up by a parent, and you felt like a failure, not good enough, and all the usual things we humans go through. However, something like this can stop us from lifting the bar on our life. We live “smaller” and don’t want to risk pushing our boundaries.

This can make us feel dissatisfied or fearful. What if we get it wrong? What if it’s not good enough? This can then lead to confusion, uncertainty and a feeling of “stuckness”. Some people are so fearful that, even in creative jobs where people brainstorm all the time, they just won’t voice their ideas, just in case. It limits our lives both professionally and personally, but it doesn’t have to be that way.

When we get stuck and we don’t know why we aren’t doing the things we really want to, it can sometimes be because it’s a values problem. Our core values drive our behaviour and, if you don’t know what your core values are, then you may not know how to achieve certain things. But for this article, we’ll concentrate on something else that can get us into a “stuck groove”.

Changing the pictures in your mind

When we are blocked mentally or emotionally from our goals, part of the reason may be the videos we are playing in our minds.

You see, we are subconsciously shooting pictures up in our minds all day long through our thoughts. But because they are just out of conscious awareness, we aren’t always aware of them, and we don’t realise that this may be part of the reason we aren’t feeling great at that moment.

For instance, if I said to you now, “Let’s go to a party tomorrow night, I know the host, it’ll be fun,” what’s your immediate reaction? “Great, what time?” Or, “Oh no, not a party, how can I get out of this?”

Whatever your reaction is, there would probably have been a picture just outside of your awareness, which also brought up a feeling that will feel good, fearful or neutral.

It all depends on your perception of the situation. This perception will then reinforce beliefs if it’s something that has come up before. For example, “I’m so shy,” or the opposite, “I love meeting new people.”

So, when coaching someone, it makes sense to help the person clarify their goal and then change the picture, therefore creating a different feeling and perception about the situation, whatever it is. This doesn’t necessarily mean you will suddenly love parties or meetings. It just means you may feel better and have a different viewpoint on the situation.

When we change feelings and beliefs about certain ideas that we may have been carrying around for years, it can be such a relief and a wonderful freeing up of energy. Coaching and NLP can help people explore and shift these patterns.

People often forget that they have a choice. In fact, they don’t always know how to generate choices for themselves. They just keep rolling out the same old ideas, feelings and behaviours, even though they don’t want to feel or act like that.

We need to change the pictures.