Is my teen Ok? Netflix’s Adolescence - do parents need to worry?

Parenting has never been simple, but parenting in the digital age? That’s a whole new level.

Gone are the days when your biggest worry was whether your child was watching TV past bedtime. As a parent of teenagers, you are faced with an increase in social media, online gaming, private messaging apps, anonymous chatrooms, and constant digital stimulation – all while trying to raise a kind, confident, and emotionally healthy young person.

If you’ve been watching Adolescence, the recent Netflix drama that's quickly become a talking point in homes across the UK, you’re probably feeling a mix of emotions. It’s raw, confronting, and unnervingly close to home for many families. More than just entertainment, it’s prompting parents to ask real, urgent questions:

• Is my teen hiding something?
• What’s happening online that I don’t know about?
• How can I protect them without pushing them away?
• When do I step in – and when do I back off?

These are not easy questions to answer – and that’s okay. The most important thing is that you’re asking.

The digital dilemma: Why it’s harder than ever to be a parent

Let’s be honest: the internet isn't going anywhere, and it’s likely to play a significant role in your teenager’s life – from schoolwork and friendships to identity and self-esteem. What’s changed is the pace. Trends shift weekly, platforms evolve overnight, and while your teen may feel completely at home in that world, many parents are left playing catch-up.

You’re not failing if you don’t know what Snapchat is, or if you’ve never used Discord. But staying informed – even just at a surface level – gives you a window into your child’s world. And right now, that window is more important than ever.

So what can you actually do?

How to feel more connected and confident with your teen

Here are some ideas to help you feel more connected and confident – and to help your teenager feel understood and supported, even when they act like they don’t want to be.

 1. Ask better questions

Teenagers are notorious for one-word answers. “How was your day?” usually gets you “Fine.” But often, it’s the questions that need tweaking, not the teen.

Try open-ended, specific, or curious questions:

• “What’s something funny that happened today?”
• “Is there a trend or meme everyone’s into right now?”
• “What do people at school think about shows like Adolescence?”

When the focus isn’t directly on them, they may feel safer to open up.

2. Watch what they’re watching (if they’ll let you)

Whether it’s Adolescence or something else, watching a show together can be a powerful entry point into their world. You don’t have to agree with everything on screen – in fact, gentle disagreement can spark meaningful conversation.

Use moments from the show as a way in:

• “Do you think that’s realistic?”
• “Would you tell a friend if they were going through that?”
• “Do you think parents in real life notice when their kids are struggling like that?”

These questions aren't interrogations – they’re conversation starters. And if your teen doesn’t want to talk right then? That’s okay too. You’ve planted the seed.

3. Respect their privacy – but stay aware

This is a tricky one. Teenagers need autonomy, but they also need boundaries. You might not want to scroll through their messages – and that’s usually the right call – but it’s okay to set clear expectations about what’s acceptable online.

Some things to consider:

• Do you know which platforms they’re using regularly?
• Are their profiles public or private?
• Have you talked about what to do if someone makes them uncomfortable online?
• Do they know it’s okay to come to you – or another trusted adult – without getting into trouble?

One helpful strategy is a “No panic policy” – letting your teen know they can talk to you about anything, even if it’s messy or uncomfortable, and you’ll respond calmly first and problem-solve second.

 4. Understand the emotional pressure they’re under

Social media isn’t just about photos and memes – it’s about identity, comparison, and performance. Many teens feel enormous pressure to appear a certain way, to respond quickly, to keep up.

This can lead to stress, low self-esteem, anxiety, and a deep fear of, “missing out.” (FOMO). 

If your child seems withdrawn, overly tired, constantly on edge, or not themselves, it could be emotional overload. They may not have the words for what they’re feeling – but they can still feel supported.

Help them name what’s going on:

• “It seems like you’ve got a lot on your plate lately – do you feel that too?”
• “I noticed you’ve been quieter than usual – want to talk or just hang out?”

You don’t need to fix everything. Just noticing can be enough.

 5. Get curious about the why behind their behaviour

Teenagers rarely act out without reason. Anger, silence, defensiveness – these are often masks for something else: insecurity, stress, or fear.

Rather than reacting to the surface-level behaviour, try to pause and wonder: What might be going on underneath?

This mindset shift – from reacting to responding – can change the dynamic completely.

Sometimes, what teens need most is a calm adult who doesn’t try to “sort it all out,” but simply offers consistent, kind support. (And if that support occasionally comes from outside the family, like a coach, mentor, or counsellor, that’s okay too.)

 6. Model healthy boundaries and self-care

It’s easy to focus entirely on your teenager – but they’re watching you, too.

Are you glued to your own screen during dinner? Do you talk openly about stress, rest, and asking for help? Teens learn by example!

Create moments of digital detox as a family. Share your own experiences of pressure or uncertainty (in age-appropriate ways). Let them see that adults don’t have it all figured out – and that’s normal.

Where does all this leave you?

You might still feel unsure. That’s normal.

You might be doing most of these things already. That’s brilliant.

Or maybe you’re realising there are gaps in how connected you feel to your teen – and you want to close them, bit by bit. That’s brave.

Support comes in many forms. Sometimes it’s a quiet chat over a cup of tea. Sometimes it’s reading a book together, or getting outside for a walk. And occasionally, it might be helpful for your teen to speak with someone neutral, who isn’t emotionally tied to the situation – someone who can help them explore what they’re feeling and where they want to go next.

Whether that’s a teacher, a coach, or a mentor, there are people – and approaches – out there that can make this stage of life feel less overwhelming for both of you.

If Adolescence has left you feeling uneasy, don’t ignore that instinct. Use it as a catalyst – not to panic, but to lean in. Keep listening, keep learning, and keep showing up, even when the door is closed.

Teenagers might not say it, but your presence – your interest, your effort, your steadiness – makes all the difference.

You don’t have to get it perfect. Just be there.

And if ever you need a sounding board along the way, well – you're not alone.