What choices are you avoiding making?
Lots of people talk about light bulb moments, or ‘a-ha!’ moments. Perhaps you’re in a job, house or relationship that isn’t working for you anymore and it’s time for a change, but you don’t know what you want or what will work for you? This light bulb moment may come when you suddenly realise that you do have a choice. It’s your life, job, relationship, house or whatever. Nobody or nothing in your world is forcing you, or trapping you to stay there. Not a lack of money, mortgage...this list could continue.
So, what are you choosing to do about your situation? There’s the key word; ‘choosing’. Ultimately you are choosing to stay in that job you hate, relationship that isn’t going anywhere etc. To prove a point, think of the rut that you’re stuck in; visualise it, get the feelings you feel when you’re in that situation, hear the sounds that you hear and then say out loud; ‘I am choosing this situation’. What effect does this have on you? Once said out loud you will notice a total incongruence with yourself.
So, now, think of the situation you want/need to change. Got it? Start by asking yourself the question; ‘what am I choosing to do today in regards to *insert situation*?'. Then, ‘How am I choosing to deal with *insert situation*?'. You will find these two questions put a completely different slant on how you deal with the situation. Listen to the excuses you automatically try and put in place and respond with the above questions. You will feel more in control of it and its outcome. For example; a recent interview with Justin Rose, the first English man to win the US Open for over forty years, told of his mental game plan (of which he has a coach for). Justin selects the right shot, executes it, accepts it (whatever is it!) and moves on. Now that’s choice, and the reward and return on that choice paying back in full. A life-long dream being realised.
Start challenging your habits today and see what exciting results come to fruition. You may find the new choice is liberating, euphoric, empowering, exciting, scary...but ultimately it’ll be the right choice for you to make.
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Jayne Cox - Specialist Women's Coaching and ConsultancyNovember 18th, 2015