Out of your comfort zone? Build in a restorative niche

We’re all familiar with the idea we should bring our “whole, true self” to work. And yet, what about everything that tells us we should also be pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone, feeling the fear and doing it anyway? The motivational slogans can be confusing and downright contradictory, particularly if you fall on the more introverted side of the population. 

Psychology research suggests that core personality traits like introversion, extraversion, and conscientiousness are largely stable in adults. Those at the more introverted end of the spectrum may feel naturally less inclined to be the centre of attention in a group setting or to start conversations with strangers. Introverts may also need less social interaction, and recharge their energy with solo time and quiet, focused tasks. 

The trouble is, much of the working world is geared around these sorts of activities as markers of progression or success - networking events, presenting our ideas to the bosses, leading team or company meetings. How do we know when to stay in our lane and play to our strengths, or when to stretch out of our comfort zone?

Dr Brian Little, celebrated Psychology professor and TED speaker, argues that while our personality traits are pretty fixed, they can be elastic in certain situations. For short bursts of time, we can stretch outside of our natural qualities and comfort zone in service of people or projects we feel strongly about. You’re naturally shy but step up to deliver that wedding speech for your sister; or chaotically disorganised but manage to stick to a precise preparation plan for an important investor meeting with your startup. 

The key thing is that we can’t sustain this stretch outside of our natural comfort zone for long periods of time. If we’re in a job role that continually pushes us outside of our natural strengths, we will end up exhausted and burnt out. But to help with short-term diversions out of our comfort zone, Dr Little suggests building in what he calls a “restorative niche” to your day. This is “the place you go when you want to return to your true self”. It can be a break from a particular type of task, or can be retreating to a physical space. 

What might you have coming up that needs a restorative niche?

The important work presentation

Give yourself a bit of space the night before to make sure your energy is refreshed, and make plans with friends on another night instead. On the day, rather than rolling into the presentation from a series of draining meetings, block time in your diary beforehand to take some deep breaths and gather your thoughts. Afterwards, reward yourself by stepping outside for a short walk and listening to your favourite podcast. This is even more important if you’ve got a few back-to-back presentations, and you know that spending your down-time between them at a noisy lunch with colleagues will leave you drained for the next session.  

The hen-do weekender

Apprehensive about that 3-day hen do for your best friend… and 24 women you’ve barely met? Or hesitant to spend a week with your whole extended family on holiday? While we can adore our loved ones and be excited to share in important moments, scheduled fun and limited spaces to escape can be a recipe for rapidly draining social batteries. To make sure you’re feeling your best, plan a few ways you could take a time out. This might be splitting off into a quieter room with a smaller group for a cup of tea, taking 15 minutes out to read, nap or meditate, or taking your trainers and heading out on a solo ‘run’ (you can always walk once you’re round the corner!)

The working-from-home lull

It’s not just introverts that need restorative niches. Maybe you’re more naturally extroverted, and find that solo time or long quiet stretches of working from home leave you feeling low and listless. Think about scheduling in moments to connect with others to boost your energy - like a phone call on your lunchtime walk, a quick chat with a neighbour, or a pub trip after work to blow off steam.