How to make the best of middle age

With middle age can come the shocking knowledge that you will not live forever. While we may know this intellectually when young, the arrival of aches and pains, diminished energy, a sudden need for comfy shoes and innumerable pairs of glasses can make mortality feel a little more real.

On our bad days, it can seem like a good option to give up now and start packing the bags for the journey to oblivion. But our middle years have some wonderful compensations for the loss of youth.

For a start, we don’t have to listen to heavy metal music anymore, if we don’t want to, and can fill our music collections with gorgeous ballads and soothing instrumentals. More seriously, we can develop a greater understanding of who we are, and prioritise self-care and gentleness towards ourselves over the short-term gratifications of our youth.

Here are some ways to make the best of middle age.

How to make the best of middle age

Enjoy slowing down and take time to relax

Your body is telling you what you need. When possible, surrender to the call of an afternoon nap. If you are at work and can’t have a snooze, take a break to shut your eyes and just be still for 15 minutes.

Watch your alcohol and coffee intake

These things can be powerful and are best used carefully for perking you up or calming you down. Be aware of their effects. There are many safe, delicious alternatives to caffeine, and the upside of less alcohol may be more clarity and energy.

Don’t keep announcing that you are old

Sure, you can share some of your gripes with ageing friends, but the workplace, a social occasion or a romantic dinner may not be the best time to draw attention to every ache and pain.

It’s your spirit people will really relate to, and a cheerful, positive spirit gives other people a better time than a complaining, negative one.

Reconnect with old friends and long-lost family

They are probably missing you too. Make new friends with your wider peer group through activities and organisations that reflect your values and interests.

Give service by volunteering or caring for others, but avoid running yourself ragged. You are a lot less effective at this if you are not well.

Change your relationship with the mirror

If you take pride in your appearance but don’t want to look as though you’re trying too hard, think of your grown-up style as “elegant”, “artistic” or “witty”. This way, you can still turn heads while feeling like yourself.

You can wear a wider range of clothes than you might think. Well-cut jeans are ageless, a good hat is always fetching, and sunglasses are endlessly glamorous.

Try not to pore over new wrinkles or broken blood vessels. Instead, smile cheerfully and briefly at your characterful new face, then get on with your life.

Middle age is not about galloping through life, hungry for the next thrill. It is about noticing the good stuff you already have, going deeper with it and nurturing it.

Let the young have youth, and claim the time of life that’s your territory, with all its potential pleasures and sense of achievement. And if you want to climb into a onesie and watch lashings of TV now and again, that too is absolutely fine