A Better Way To Deal With Problems

The questions we ask ourselves shape the way we think, feel and respond to challenges. Often, the reason a problem persists is not the problem itself, but the unhelpful questions we repeatedly ask about it. This article explores the difference between problem-focused and solution-focused questioning and how a simple shift in perspective can help uncover practical solutions and new possibilities.

It may not be the problem that is the problem. In this article, I want to share some useful questions that can powerfully alter your feelings about a problem and help you think constructively about how to resolve it.

When the real problem is your focus

Our ability to produce intelligent solutions to complex problems is a direct result of our ability to ask useful questions about that problem. So it is not thinking per se that we need to be good at, necessarily, although this helps too, but asking smart questions.

If you have a problem that simply won’t go away (whatever it is, health, relationship or work-related), it may not be the problem that is the real problem, but the kind of questions you are asking yourself about it and the people involved.

Are you paying attention to the kind of questions you are asking about the problem? It is useful to set aside 10 to 15 minutes for this. You can run any subject through these questions, career, relationship, weight loss or a conflict.

Comparing two different approaches

The idea is to answer both sets of questions and compare the notes afterwards to see for yourself what an effect it can have. It’s really interesting what comes up! (When I self-coach myself, I use over 100 of these kinds of power questions.)

The first set of questions is the types we often unconsciously ask ourselves. We do it by habit, and in our everyday moments. These kinds of questions are unhelpful because they do not point our focus in the direction of our resources and abilities to solve the problem we are faced with.

The second set of questions directs our focus to our innate resources and ability to solve complex problems. For the exercise and for comparison, it is useful if you run the same problem through both sets of questions. But don’t get stuck!

Questions that keep us stuck

"What's wrong?"

“How does it you feel?”

"Why do you have this problem?"

"How long have you had it?"

"Whose fault is it?" 

Solution-focused questions that create progress

The second set constructively directs our focus towards the solutions. The information that this set of questions digs up contains the solution to the actual problem. Try it for yourself and see.

"What do you want, specifically, (instead of the problem)?"

“What will you see when you have what you want?”

“How will it feel, exactly, to have what you want?”

"How will you know, specifically, that you have it?"

"In what ways will your life improve?"

"What small thing could you do today to bring you closer or to improve the situation?"

Using Future Projection to Find Solutions

This is one of my favourites: “Projecting yourself to the time in the future when you have successfully resolved the issue, – knowing what you now know – turn and look back and notice at least five of the steps that you took, or five things you did (or stopped doing) to have this issue resolved.“

Of course, if you have more complex problems that require an in-depth analysis and constructive troubleshooting, please get in touch.