Where does “ME” time fit in on your to-do list?

Self-Care is often overlooked.  And it makes sense why we may devalue its worth. 

...And WHY it needs be at the top!

In the priorities of the modern world…where can it surely fit in with the demands of everyday life, keeping your head afloat and fighting to meet the never-ending deadlines? 

We can become so judgemental of ourselves and others to perform a certain way, where success is defined in monetary terms rather than what truly matters to each individual that we can often forget the journey to reaching “success”. 

So at what point do we stop and listen to what we truly want? And consider what does “success” even mean to us?

Here is the answer… more often than not, we don't! And instead, we wait for the emotional or physical response. The sleepless nights, the health problems, relationship breakdowns, and mental health breakdowns. 

When self-care is ignored, our nervous system is put on high alert, stretched to the limits, craving the competitive drive to reach a level of success predetermined by society, misconceptions, and an imbalance in who we truly are. 

Thus the journey of seeking happiness can be long and disappointing as decisions and even indecisions create troublesome outcomes. 

Take time to pause and reflect

So take a pause and reflect on each item on your to-do list today.

• How do they fit in with what you are working towards in your life-time goals?
• If you didn’t do it today or tomorrow, what would that mean to you in a year, two years' time, five years' time? 
• How does each item on your list make you feel? 
• How would it feel if you completely removed it from your to-do list? Delegate or de-prioritised? 
• Are you even working on a to-do list? Or are you being pulled from one thing to the next? 

When we move without consideration of the overall end goal, our end goal can feel scattered. Like we have to be everywhere…all at the same time. We can also realise that what we have been working on, actually has no bearing on where we want to be. 

When we know where we want to be, we realise the race becomes a marathon and we consider all the elements required to get there. The training, the nutrition, footwear…all elements become equally important including rest and self-care. And we can consider how we will enjoy the journey for the long haul, rather than the sprint.

Now consider how it would feel to prioritise your self-care and place it as number 1 on your to-do list.  Maybe this practice feels too hard, awkward or selfish for you right now. Or maybe you just don’t know how to slow down.

I hear you. There are so many beliefs at play that can stop our human self from believing we deserve this “ME” time, or to feel safe to “be” in this space. 

And so, when you have also been conditioned to work with no time for reflection, restoration, and just be, it can be like transitioning a car from 6th gear to 2nd. 

So rather than dismiss the emotions that come up, try to:

• Allow yourself to just notice.
• Consider the benefits that will arise by giving yourself this space. How will it impact you, the way you show up, and what you can give to your day? Who else could this impact by you giving yourself this space?

And, finally... 

• Practice. Practice. Practice. 

Here are my 10 top tips to help you along the way

1. Schedule in self-care. Just like you would with any other appointment. If you can, colour code it so you can see the balance in the week.
2. Nurture yourself. Take note of how this looks for you. This could be meeting for a walk with a friend or snuggled with your favourite book and a coffee. What you are drawn to may be different from one day to the next and to what your body needs from you.
3. My body is my temple. So I am not saying ditch all the treats, But do be mindful of what you eat and drink plenty of water. Notice how you feel when you eat certain foods. And consider tools for bringing your energy into flow (Massage, Reiki, Sound Therapy are examples of how you can restore flow and balance into your energetic body).
4. Get moving If you are new to exercise, have a play with what feels good to you. For me, some days it is dance and yoga and other days running. So be mindful of how you feel from one day to the next, season or time in your life.
5. All about balance. Check-in with your exercise schedule. If is all high intensity, can you incorporate some yoga flow/ mindful walks/ dance so you balance the energy flow?
6. Meditate. Meditation can allow the nervous system to calm down, catch a breath and find stability. We then go further as we take a journey of self-discovery. For some, this isn't accessible yet. Remember that is ok and look at this list holistically and as a journey.  
7. Write your thoughts down. Free some space up in your mind to allow your new thoughts to come through. Maybe you notice a pattern of events, or you use your journal to communicate what you struggle to say out loud.
8. Surround yourself with positivity. Easier said than done right? Again, so I'm not saying ditch your closest family and friends here, but have a plan on how you will manage your energy with the challenging people in your life.
9. Be kind to yourself. This is so god damn important!! Rome was not built in a day. You are where you should be. But not where you need to end up!
10. Let go. Of comparing yourself to others. You are unique, no one else has lived your path.

This list is by no means exhaustive. I would love to hear what works for you. Please leave your comments below 👇