Reconnecting with confidence: Find the innate power within you

Confidence. It's a word that often conjures images of public speakers, charismatic leaders, and people who seem to exude an unshakeable belief in themselves. But what if I told you that confidence isn't something you build? What if true confidence is something you already have, something that's simply waiting to be reconnected with?


The misconception of building confidence

We live in a world that tells us we need to build confidence. Books, YouTube, and coaches all promise techniques to create a more confident you. But they often miss a fundamental truth about human nature.

Confidence is not an external construct you need to build brick by brick. It’s an innate quality, your factory setting, disrupted only by layers of doubtful thoughts and fear that life has stacked upon it.

The factory setting: Confidence as your default state

Imagine, for a moment, that your mind is like a computer. When you were born, it came with default settings – happiness, resilience, and yes, confidence. These are your original settings, free from the clutter of insecurity and self-doubt. Over time, though, perceptions of experiences, societal pressures, and negative thoughts act like malware, disrupting your system. 

The good news? You can always reset to those factory settings. Confidence is never lost; it's merely veiled.

Unveiling confidence through awareness

So, how do you peel back these layers and reconnect with your innate confidence? The answer lies in awareness. Think of awareness as the light that cuts through the fog. It doesn’t change the landscape but reveals what's already there. By becoming aware of your thoughts, you start to realise that you are not your thoughts. You are the awareness observing them.

When you anchor yourself in this awareness, the fog lifts. You see clearly that those thoughts telling you you're not good enough are just that – thoughts, not reality. And in that clarity, you reconnect back to your natural confidence.

Dispelling the myths: Confidence vs ego

Let’s tackle another misconception: confidence is often mistaken for ego. They may look similar on the surface, but they're very different. Ego is loud, boastful, and fragile, constantly seeking validation from the outside. Confidence is quiet, unassuming, and solid, needing no external approval.

Ego says, "I’m better than you." Confidence says, "I’m good enough." Ego is about comparison and competition. Confidence is about self-assurance and inner peace.

Practical steps to reconnect with your confidence

Now that we’ve understood confidence isn’t something you build but reconnect with, how do you practically go about it?

1. Practice mindfulness

Mindfulness is the practice of bringing your attention to the present moment. By focusing on the now, you become more aware of your thoughts and less entangled in them. This helps you see through the thoughts and reconnect with your inherent confidence.

2. Challenge negative thoughts

When you notice negative thoughts, don’t just accept them. Question them. Are they based on facts, opinions or assumptions? Often, you'll find they crumble under scrutiny, revealing the truth or your inner confidence.

3. Surround yourself with positivity

The company you keep influences your mindset. Mirror neurons in the brain mimic and synchronise with other people. So, surround yourself with people who uplift you, who see your potential, they'll encourage you to reconnect with your inner confidence.

4. Reflect on past successes

Take a moment to reflect on your past achievements, or better still - write them down, no matter how small. These are tangible proof of your capabilities. When you recognise the evidence, your mind will quieten down and you'll 'feel' the inner confidence within.

5. Feelings are feedback on thinking

Confidence isn't about always feeling good. It's about understanding that feelings are feedback on thinking. Your mind will often try to trick you into believing your feelings are facts and confirmation of the validity of thoughts, that's not true. By recognising you're only feeling your thinking will reconnect with your inner confidence.

The journey back to yourself

Reconnecting with your innate confidence is not a distant dream but a journey back to yourself. It’s about peeling away the layers of societal conditioning, doubtful thinking and fears that have clouded your true essence.

Confidence is your birthright, your factory setting, your default state. By embracing awareness, challenging negative thoughts, and mindful practices, you can unveil this hidden treasure.

So, the next time you think you need to build confidence, remember: it's already within you. All you need to do is see the truth and you reconnect.

The views expressed in this article are those of the author. All articles published on Life Coach Directory are reviewed by our editorial team.

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Leeds LS25 & London WC2H
Written by Robin Goldsbro - Level Seven Coaching, Ultimate Mindset: Confidence, Resilience and well-being
Leeds LS25 & London WC2H

I'm Robin, a Mindset, Leadership, and Performance Coach - I help people reconnect to innate and unwavering confidence, resilience, and focused minds. If you're into being happy, exceptional and making a difference then I'm here to help..

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