Goals in your life

Humans are goal directed animals, in that we are innately programmed to eat approximately every four hours - breakfast then lunch and then dinner.

Your life really gives you opportunities and experiences to learn from to ensure that you can build on past experiences and possibly create a happier life in the future, whether focusing on relationships, your health and/or your chosen career path.

Unfortunately, or fortunately, we have three brains: the limbic system, the neo cortex and in particular our reptile brain which works on your primal needs, such as eating, survival, sex and maintenance of all human systems.

The 1977 Dragons of Eden book, by Carl Sagan will go into much more detail than this article will allow me, so if you want to research further, this is a good starting point.

The reptilian brain consists of the upper part of the spinal cord and the basal ganglia, the diencephalon, and parts of the midbrain - all of which sits atop the spinal column like a knob in the middle of our heads.

It is thought to represent a fundamental core of the nervous system and derives from a form of mammal-like reptile that once ranged widely over the world but disappeared during the Triassic period having provided the evolutionary link between dinosaurs and mammals. All modern mammals have this reptilian complex, including humans.

This area of the brain controls the nervous system and is thought to be millions of years in the making.

Your basic emotions such as fear, love, hate and contentment are automatically created from this part of the brain, automating reactions to everyday situations from your actual present reality to your thoughts about someone or something.

Many years ago fear was a great 'reactive mental tool' to ensure you were not eaten by a large animal with sharp teeth, although the 'animal' fear today can be replaced and generated by you  fears or fear of your current experiences: relationships, days at work and or being involved in a traffic altercation -the list goes on.

When we examine how we react to a situation, it is easy to see that our past actually pollutes our present.

Your reptilian brain loves the 'familiar' and does not like 'unfamiliar', this can be traced back to surviving as I stated before.

So when faced with a new challenge, such as job interview, new relationship or even changing an old behaviour to enhance your life; you may interpret this as a new experience to avoid, even though getting that new job or starting a new relationship may provide you with many great opportunities.

Goals in your life might not be as cut and dry as you think because you are trying to overcome many years of your possible bad experiences combined with your automatic reactions to staying with your current situation for fear of the unknown.

Fear of failure or being uncomfortable is a big part of goals not being pursued or being achieved, although this is linked to your six human needs which if they are not fulfilled can lead to individuals violating one of their values such as family, a current relationship and/or their own self-respect.

Feedback could be the word that replaces failure as it is not 'finite', this word can conjure up in your mind and body a possibility that you can still succeed via learning from that past experience even though it may not have gone to plan.

When goals you set are written down, this is just the start of a process that if carried out properly with understanding of how we all think and behave, then you can achieve these consistently through out your life.

OAF is an acronym for outcome: being specific about your goal(s), such as a timeline of when it will happen and then breaking the goal into smaller manageable chunks, i.e if you want to drop a dress size from 16 down to a 12 in a period of time then possibly losing a few pounds each week is great and gives you momentum to reach size 14, then so on until size 12. So it is then up to you how you do this which is the process, i.e visit the gym three times a week, eat healthy 80% of the week (training is a small part of the formula for losing and maintaining permanent weight loss).

ACUITY: This being aware of whether you are close to achieving through your senses and ultimately checking or evaluating your current goal journey.

This does mean checking your process - Did you go to the gym three times? Did you eat healthy most of the week?

If you are not close to achieiving your goal do you need to re evaluate on your actual process?

FLEXIBILITY: What happens if the gym is shut, do you equipment at home or a coach to ensure you are meeting deadlines?

Also you may reach size 14 and feel great as you are toned up, have lots of compliments from friends and the original size 12 is not wanted or desired through your new feelings about yourself at size 14.

So we have albeit briefly looked at goal setting to goal getting, but one area of this is more important than anything I have mentioned, which is why do you want the goal(s)? Is it health reasons i.e. a doctor has suggested you lose weight, you want more confidence before a holiday or you and your partner are both changing to a healthier lifestyle?

Strong enough reasons will give you the energy and the motivation to exercise at 6am or exercise in the day (by the way the former does burn far more calories and actually sets you up for the day giving energy boosts).

Going back to the subconscious mind and your reptile brain, this is proven to control you for around 95% of the day - your actions will be hard wired and so your habits do need to be changed which is proven to take around 66 days. Although faster methods such as Neuro-Linguistic Programming and hypnosis can change your overeating and or ensure confidence is increased..

You may want to research the 3,000 plus articles on how the subconscious mind can be controlled and support you to reach your ideal dress size, get the career or even improve a current relationship.

There is an old saying:

"Repeating the same actions/process or thoughts over and over again, expecting to get different results, now that really is the definition of insanity!"

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Written by Dominic Borsberry - Life Coaching and Hypnotherapy

Change your year 2020 - do not be unhappy or stressed again...
I offer hypnotherapy coaching to help remove anxiety, depression, OCD, weight loss and phobias.
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Written by Dominic Borsberry - Life Coaching and Hypnotherapy

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