Do you believe everything you think?

Do negative thoughts overcome you?

If you are browsing this website and reading this article, you might be contemplating hiring a life coach, wondering whether it could be right for you.

So some questions I have for you are: do you believe everything you think? Do you feel like you have ultimate control over the way you think? Do you often read situations negatively? Do you blame people or circumstances for your situation? Do you sometimes feel helpless?

All these questions are very important in the field of coaching. What make us feel anxious, depressed and sometimes phobic is usually our apparent lack of control over our situation. Our belief in our inability to change our thoughts and behaviours will very often be the route of our problems.

The importance of learning to rationalise our negative thoughts:

By asking ourselves pertinent and challenging questions about the negative thoughts, we can dispute and eradicate them.

Example: You walk into a room and smile at a person you know, they don’t smile back.

Negative thoughts: "They don’t like me, they are ignoring me, no one likes me in this room, they have all been talking about me, I am useless and unlikeable".

Challenging questions to ask yourself:

• Is the thought real? Is it true? Could the person be worrying about something that is bothering them and be completely oblivious to you?

• What evidence have you to prove your thought?

• One person not smiling at you, can it really mean you are useless?

• Does this really mean that everyone in the room doesn’t like you?

• Is your current mood affecting your judgement?

• Are you nervous, anxious and thinking the worst?

This is a really simple example. To be able to recognise a negative and disempowering thought is the key, then you can learn and practice challenging it. If you can master this, then you are gaining control of your thoughts and consequently your emotions. Thus increasing your self-esteem and self-confidence.

Remember, don’t believe everything you think.