Do you cling onto life when change is afoot?
I witnessed a discomforting situation recently, a child clinging onto the parent and saying “no, no, no” as the parent was attempting a nursery drop-off.
Reflecting on this (once I was over my own emotions about the situation), it made me think about how I see those behaviours when we know that we want or need to change, or even introduce new habits. It’s perhaps a tenuous link for you right now; I get that… but please read on…
It sometimes feels like this though right? We know what really needs to happen, but we fight and resist it, hanging on to what we know and feel comfortable with.
Sometimes there might be tears, either when we are not getting what we want in terms of results, or perhaps when we realise that we are holding onto beliefs or habits which no longer serve us in a positive way.
The truth is; change is hard! It takes sustained effort and energy, a disciplined focus on the outcomes instead of an instant reward. When things are good, it’s easier for sure, and of course willpower only sustains for so long.
Depending on where you are on your journey, anxiety may creep in. Perhaps a new habit is exercising daily, and you hear comments from friends and family which are intended to be helpful but sometimes with an edge… "You’re really running every day? Watch those knees, running is very bad for knees”, or “you’re looking a bit tired, are you doing too much?”.
At times, this can spur us on towards proving someone wrong, but for others, it could just trigger something in you which is about giving up.
You see, it all depends on your own belief system; there are times when hanging onto an unhealthy habit or behaviour might work for us in the short term – example, eating cake as a reward. I’m not saying don’t do that, but if you consistently apply that habit to every reward, then it could be having a consequence elsewhere, unless there is another habit you have in place to offset it?
So, how do you cope with change – are you a ‘clinger on’, or do you let go and embrace new ways?
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About Amie Crews
Amie is an exceptional personal and executive coach who brings a gentle yet highly motivational way of provoking thinking, which helps her achieve fantastic outcomes for those she works with.
She has great energy and creates a space which enables her clients to have a relaxed focus that leads to real breakthroughs.