Being stuck? It might be your blind spot
You drive to work every day, you arrive safely but one day, your car decides to give up and you are stuck. You call a friend to ask if he can pick you up, he asks you to tell him where you are and the directions. But you know what, you can’t give proper directions because you are so used to the route that you can’t recall the number of side streets, bends, etc. Now you are really stuck. Your route to work has become a blind spot: the obvious that you can’t see...
The same happens on another level. The way you respond to people, the way you act out or the way you react to a certain situation. People around you see clearly what happens and you don’t have a clue.
Recently, I had a session with a new client who claimed to be a very positive person. However, the questionnaire they filled in for me, showed that they were actually quite negative and a real worrier. One of the ways it came out was in their language; everything was coming from the dark side, such as ‘not too difficult’ (= easy) or ‘not too bad’ (= good) or ‘better than yesterday’ (= greatly improved). When I pointed that out to the client what they were doing, they were taken aback. The client was totally unaware of what how negative their language was. Their way of communication was a blind spot and seeing it in the light made it possible to make changes. If you are looking to be more aware of your language, a life coach may help by offering tips and advice.
The obvious thing about the blind spot, is that you need somebody else to help you to find it. Not necessarily to point it out to you; that is similar to ‘I told you’, but to guide you towards the discovery. When it is your own discovery, you grasp it.
Blind spots can often undermine confidence and prevent you from making the right decisions, feeling in control or happy. But you can’t see them - the signs you get are feeling stuck and not knowing how to get out or knowing that something is not right, but you are not sure why and how. The so called "niggles".
If you are stuck, have any niggles and want to discover your blind spot, ask your friends or book a session with a life coach.
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About Mariette Jansen
Dr Mariette Jansen (Dr De-Stress) is a psychological coach, using therapy models, coaching techniques and mindfulness meditation to help you become balanced, stress free and in control of your life.
Focus areas are work-life balance, confidence, food/diet stress and general stress.
Author of two books: on meditation and exam stress.