1. Pretend you have only just met each other
When we have been with our partner for years we tend to become ‘comfortable’ and stop asking those exploratory get-to-know-you questions. You may think you already know everything there is to know about one another but in actual fact this couldn’t be further from the truth. According to Terri Orbuch, the author of 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage from Good to Great, we should continue to ask each other the little questions. Ask what it is your partner thought of that film, TV programme, song or meal etc. We all develop and change over time and that doesn’t suddenly stop when we are in a relationship. Daily check-ins such as those suggested will help to continue developing the connection between partners.
2. Women – consider someone who isn’t ‘your type’
Research conducted by Benjamin R. Karney and his team of researchers at the University of California has revealed that coupling up with someone who is ‘less’ attractive than you could be the key to long-term love. The study, which was published in The Journal of Family Psychology, showed that men who were married to more attractive women were more likely to step up to the plate and help their wives to achieve their goals. This was not a pattern identified in men who were considered more attractive than their wives.
3. Limit alcohol consumption
Whilst unwinding with a bottle of red with your partner after work may seem like a great idea, too much alcohol can shake up a relationship. According to research, young adults who drink heavily (five plus drinks for men, four plus drinks for women) are less likely to marry in the first place and may then be at a greater risk of divorcing if they do.
4. Curb time spent online
An obsession with a social networking sites is not romantic. A survey of 100,000 individuals conducted by OkCupid.com has revealed that individuals who ‘tweet’ frequently are more likely to have shorter relationships (an average of 10% shorter) than those who do not.
5. Encourage your friends to stay together
Researchers have found that the breakdown of a relationship between your close friends could increase your chances of splitting with your own partner by as much as 75%. Author of the study Rose McDermott said “Some people may see another’s divorce as permission to change their own life,”. However, she added that encouraging friends to stay together (happily), may generate reasons that also apply to your own relationship.
If you are experiencing some turbulence in any of your relationships then relationship coaching could provide you with some positive ways to move forward. For further information about Relationship Coaching, please visit our fact-sheet.
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