Who Needs A Coach Anyway?
5th August, 20100 Comments
I believe that many of us have the potential to be much more than we ever achieve if only we understood the importance of allowing someone to reflect back to us what we already know but somehow fail to realise.
So where are you at this moment in time? Are you completely happy? Do you know exactly what you want and how to get it? Do you wake up each day and think wow let me out into the world or do you feel I wish I could lie here all day?
Alternatively, are you so busy that you do not actually have time to think? Do you blindly follow a path each day that leads you to your bed wondering what has been achieved other than being another day older?
Or perhaps you look forward to your bed as a retreat from a lifestyle that saps your energy and leaves you feeling that you have given all and received little in return?
If you can relate to any of these feelings it may just be that you could benefit from some Lifestyle Coaching.
Would you drive your car relentlessly day in day out without a service, without checking the oil, water and fuel? Many people do and survive without a breakdown but the peace of mind achieved by regular service is so much better. So why do so many of us place so little emphasis upon servicing our own mind body and spirit?
Despite a significant amount of publicity covering the emergence of Life Coaching as a profession in the UK, I am regularly asked what a Life Coach does. When one considers the slow growth of Holistic Therapies which are based upon centuries of eastern practice it is perhaps not so surprising that a practice deriving from America with a short western history has not yet established itself in all parts of Britain.
To sum up the benefits of Life Coaching in one short article would be to do it a disservice. Here I wish to provide a philosophical view which hopefully will appeal also to the scientifically minded reader.
Why is Lifestyle Coaching a worthwhile service? Well let me offer you a philosophy that is not too far from being scientific, based upon what I term as ‘The Passion Triangle’.
The passion triangle is a diagrammatic way to look at what ingredients can play a major role in happiness. Happiness Coaching is now established as a field of coaching in its own right, so we can assume it is an important part of coaching.
As the name ‘Passion triangle’ suggests the first component is passion, which I believe to be must if we are to be happy. What is passion?
In the passion triangle I am suggesting that passion is a feeling of excitement, an enduring state of mind to which one returns time and time again which always provides a feeling of energy and well being. It is a want, a desire that pushes other albeit important things aside. I would suggest that if you do not have a passion for anything the likelihood of achieving your true potential is greatly diminished.
Ok so you have passion. Is that enough to maintain a happy state? Motivational trainers would likely say you need goals. Without doubt if you have a purpose towards which you are moving with passion you are some way towards feeling happy.
So this is where a coach can be a great asset. A coach can help you to find your passion if it has not yet emerged. A coach can help you to see that what you are passionate about may have areas of potential that you have not as yet realised.
I suggest that happiness is proportionate to passion, purpose and potential.
On a scale of 1-10 how much do you really want something?
On a scale of 1-10 how clearly have you defined the steps towards achieving that goal?
On a scale of 1-10 what is the potential for the realisation of your goals?
The area I have defined as happiness could be described in many other ways. It could be thought of as well being, success or comfort. No matter what positive term you choose to apply to it, there will be an increase in capacity proportional to the passion purpose and potential. How big is your passion triangle?
Ok so there we have a simple symbolic representation that theorises 3 major components of my Life Coaching philosophy. I happily proffered this model for many years until I realised it was essentially flawed!
I realised that maybe, just maybe, happiness was not the ultimate pursuit.
What if there is something missing?
Then it came to me, there is! Something huge is missing.
My passion triangle is fine for a person who loves something, knows all about what they love and is completely happy planning how they can turn that love into their life’s ambition. Some people are happy for lifetime planning something that they never actually achieve.
However in order to turn that ambition into reality there is one more ‘P’ required!
Without performance potential cannot be achieved. That’s the real value of a coach!
How many of us know what needs to be done but for some reason just fail to actually do it?
Many of us know what to do to lose weight but remain overweight. Many of us know how to get fit but remain unfit. Many of us know how to relax but remain stressed out. Yes a coach can help you translate what you know you want and know how to achieve, but somehow fail to get there, into reality.
So the passion triangle grew into the coaching performance pyramid.
Symbolically there is a correlation between the stifled individual who has limited passion, little purpose, does not plan nor act out their plans and has nowhere to go and what I call the “small world pyramid”.
Likewise the feeling of freedom and growth that can be achieved by growing one’s passion, creating purposeful plans, and performing the necessary actions to achieve one’s true potential is symbolically represented in the “big world pyramid”.
Some fortunate people can tread this path alone, many need a coach to guide, help, reassure and inspire them.
Some may shy away from contacting Life Coaches in the fear that it may be an expensive process. This is not necessarily the case. Many coaches are prepared to offer Life Clubs which considerably cuts the cost of one to one coaching and offers a chance for up to ten people to share ideas and motivational support in an environment which is professionally supervised.
Returning to the analogy of fuelling your car, a one to one session with a coach can cost less than a tank of petrol but give you the energy for the journey of a lifetime.
A life club session can cost less than a decent bottle of wine yet produce the same feel good factor without the hangover. So why is coaching still not as populated as the garage forecourts, or many wine bars?
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Caroline Wellingham - Accredited Career and Life Coach, NLP PractitionerJuly 12th, 2017