10 powerful tips to change the way you think for the better

The way we think affects how we feel, how we respond to situations and the decisions we make every day. Yet many people go through life held back by old habits, negative beliefs and fears that have become second nature. Over time, these ways of thinking can influence our confidence, relationships, and ability to achieve what we want in life. The good news is that our thoughts are not set in stone, and with awareness and practice it is possible to develop healthier, more constructive ways of thinking.

Changing the way you think does not happen overnight, nor does it require dramatic changes. Often, it is the small shifts in perspective and daily habits that have the greatest impact. The following ten tips are designed to help you recognise unhelpful thought patterns, build greater self-belief and take a more positive approach to life's challenges. Start with the ones that resonate most with you and build from there.

If you're ready to break free from limiting thoughts and take a more positive approach to life, these ten practical tips are a great place to start.

Tip 1  

Let go of your personal history. Accept it, understand it (Get help with this if you need to) and then move on. Losing the blame mentality is a really tough one for many people, but the truth is that, however the past affected you, you own it - No one can upset you, no one can 'make' you angry or anything else unless you allow it to. Losing the blame is incredibly self-empowering because then you can begin to take control of the only thing you have - and that is the way you 'allow' yourself to react to somebody else's actions or situation.

Tip 2

Remove pressuring, dictating words from your language. Words such as 'You should do this', 'You must do that', and 'Nobody likes to be dictated to' often come up, and we are speaking from our view of the world according to our values. Learn to release your control a little on how you need things to be in your life; needing is just that - needy. Tell yourself that you can want things a certain way, but you don't 'need' them to be that way for you to be happy.

Tip 3

Drop your negative labels
'I'm so useless', 'I never get anything right', I am a worrier because my parents were worriers', etc. A famous quotation by Ralph Waldo Emerson states: 'You become what you think about all day long.' Once you label yourself, you begin to act as if it were true. Think about those childhood beliefs suggested by others that you may still hold on to today.

Tip 4

Become aware of when you are thinking Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTS)
Perhaps you are fortune-telling - Predicting how you think things will turn out with no actual evidence of that, or Mind Reading - Such as ' He's probably thinking I'm stupid'.

Tip 5

Stop confusing thought with fact. This is what happens when you think something and act as if it were true.
Just because you believe something to be true does not necessarily mean that it is. It is simply your perception of the facts based on past experiences and unhelpful, distorted, irrational thinking. Worrying about anything that might happen in the future based on past or any other negative experiences does not in itself change anything.

Tip 6

Believe in yourself. If you do not believe in yourself, how can you expect anyone else to or for yourself to achieve what it is that you want to achieve? No one can experience life exactly the way you do. Believing in your own judgement, gaining a sense of independence and knowing that you can handle anything, good or bad, will help you to continue to grow. Turn obstacles into challenges and continue to surprise yourself. Become your own best friend and encourage yourself.  Ask yourself Do I believe I can do this, Do I believe it will work out?"

Whether you believe you can, or whether you believe you can't you're probably right Henry Ford

Tip 7

Do not allow yourself to go through life living out unfulfilled dreams over and over. If you want to give up your job and train for something else, ask yourself what it is that is REALLY stopping you and start there. Often, it is based on fear. Fear of failure, fear of not being good enough, fear of rejection, etc. Turn 'What If' into a 'So What' mentality.

Tip 8

Visualise yourself as living the life you want to lead and then get to work on making it happen by only focusing on positive steps and blocking out any negative, unhelpful thoughts. Try visualising stepping into the shoes of someone already living that way to get a sense of how it feels. Be prepared to let go of some of your perfectionism for things to go 100% the way you want them to.

Tip 9

Become more mindfully aware of being in the moment - Notice how when you are driving a car, you are not experiencing the moment - You may be allowing your thoughts to wander or be distracted by past or future events. Loosen your grip on the steering wheel, bring your thoughts back to the present moment and practice living your life that way, whether you are at work, at home or wherever you are. In this way, it becomes much easier to let things go and not hold onto resentment. As Wayne Dyer quotes, 'It's not the snake bite that kills you, but the venom that flows around your body'.

Tip 10

Laugh at life, it is simply an experience, rather like a character you are playing, and you get to choose whether you want to play the vulnerable victim, the nasty one, the kind one, the easy-going one, etc., at any given time. Know that you are not stuck in a certain way just because you've always been that way.

Ready for change?

When is 'Now' going to be a good time to change the way that you think for the better?

Today? Next week? Or only in the dreams of your ideal life?

A cognitive behavioural life coach can support you with all of this. If you feel you could benefit from having someone on your side supporting you through this process, then research the life coaches listed.

Begin living the life you've always dreamed about and become the person that you've always wanted to be.