Self-esteem and Decison Making
5th November, 20130 Comments
Written by: Keith Abrahams MAC, MBA
Self-esteem allows an individual to believe himself to be capable, significant and worthy as a member of their community and/or society. In work, it can be how we feel about our place in the organisation. In that sense self-esteem is the value we place upon ourselves as a person.
It is important that we are supported and helped to feel positive about ourselves, as this will enable and motivate us to take care of ourselves and others too, as well as learn and move towards achievement; all factors vital to personal and business goals.
In particular, individuals can only make healthy, independent decisions when they feel positive about themselves.
In seeking coaching (executive, business or career) it is probably not surprising that many senior and competent people find that an accumulation of pressures and demands can rock even the highest sense of self-esteem.
Pressure can come from the day to day job, from the difficult decisions that need to be made and from staff, peers and seniors. For some it can also come from shareholders. Invariably and inevitably, such pressure is frequently accompanied exactly at the same time as a demanding personal life.
At these times of stress, decisions and decision making becomes more difficult, contributing to stress and often resulting in both a lower sense of self-esteem and a sense of being overwhelmed. Neither are necessarily true, but it is what is felt and experienced.
The first thing a coach will do is help you become emotionally calm. This is because we can only make really healthy, independent decisions when we feel good about ourselves.
Once there, it is then possible to begin discussing your potential options, testing each one for:
1. Feasibility (are the resources available?)
2. Achievability (can it be done?)
3. Acceptability (personally, socially and organisationally?)
This would then move into a discussion about how well the options fit with your goals, both business and personal. A balance sheet of all the potential advantages and disadvantages can then be produced so that you can start to become confident and secure with your goals.
By this time it is not unusual for you to start to feel that you have more influence over your life, and for self-esteem to start to rise.
Sometimes, however, a clear cut answer will not be apparent. This can be frustrating and a potential knock to self-esteem. In this situation it is not unusual to adopt the Four D change model and to spend some time Dreaming, before doing some Discovery and further Design around the potential solutions.
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