Leading yourself to getting what you want requires a new level of consciousness

Regret is one of the most commonly learned emotional imprints that can be developed as it reflects on the time and opportunities that are in the past and therefore irreplaceable.

However just because you may have a few regrets doesn’t mean you have to let them control your future and the new opportunities that lay on your path ahead. In reality for you to see and take those opportunities may require you to develop some new personal leadership habits.

Habits are created through repetition yet derive from a collection of thoughts and emotions that either forced you or compelled you to take the action in the first place. Repetition of the actions results in a firm set of beliefs and therefore habits that you know always lead to a certain outcome. 

However here are some questions that are useful to ask in regards to habits: -

• How much are your current actions serving your greatest needs? 

• Have you given yourself a check-up from the neck up and identified your redundant behaviours? 

• How much are you lost by habitual unconscious thinking that is outdated compared to the thoughts that support your current needs?

Habits are built up over time either intentionally but more so unintentionally. Habits become unconscious behaviours fairly quickly requiring little energy or effort at first, although they can become cumbersome and energy sapping if we do not refine them so that they contribute to new impacting goals.

Effective personal leadership habits give you a source of energy and can be projected out into the world to create the change that you desire. Remember where ever your attention goes, your energy will flow. The one precious existence that you have can be a legacy if you let it and get out of your own way. Leaving your own mark to show that life was beyond your own identity is an illustration of a legacy that served others and gave them meaning in their lives. 

However do you know deep down what your innermost desires are?  Most people have spent more time booking their holidays rather than planning how they would like their life to look like.

This tends to be down to several factors. Normally because of the rules that other people impose on us and that does include rules imposed by family members. Also many people live in the grip of fear; fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of not being good enough, fear of abandonment, fear of humiliation. Fear is all around us.

But isn’t this enough reason to create new personal leadership habits? 

Even though you would be conquering a fear and moving away from a form of pain, you could alternatively be moving towards the following: -

• To become more competent at something you desire.
• To become masterful of that thing you desire.
• To live a life on your own terms.
• To make it easier to make a difference in the world by being the best that you can be.

Effective personal leadership comes at a price. Actually all consciously intended change comes with consequences – some good, some not so good. It’s all about sacrifice and asking is it worth it? The changes that you make in yourself and the life that you desire will come with challenges.

Too many people are resentful of making these changes and hope to stay the same, yet wonder why still so much change happens to them (self-fulfilling prophecy and a resistance to change is energy sapping and emotionally damaging as change is inevitable).

Also despite the personal resistance that we can impose to ourselves, we then have to tackle what resistance we experience from our relatives. The only way to move through this is to clarify your reality in the knowledge that you do not need relatives to verify that you exist and you want to change. 

Often people do not like to be different or stand out from the crowd.  This unnecessary attention will bring along with it judgements and criticism from others that results in an old habitual response and limitation. Strength of character such as courage, objectivity and honesty will help you shift past this old mind set and lead to a new set of behaviours that creates outcomes congruent with your desires.

In short, if you are going to continue living with some form of fear, make it a fear of regret. Moving away from regret will be moving towards its opposite…desire. Moving towards a clear defined perception of what is important to you will see you adopt a new set of personal leadership behaviours that are energising, nourishing to the heart and no doubt well received by others.