Discover the pitfalls of perfectionism
In today's society perfectionism is rife and sadly many wear it as a badge of honour making sweeping statements such as:
"I like to get things absolutely spot on as I am a perfectionist"
People who say this clearly have no clue they are advertising their weaknesses, rather than their strengths as aiming to be perfect is self-defeating as it is an illusion.
It keeps people focused on failure, self-doubt, rejection, and in low self-esteem.
Your attachment to perfectionism is a direct reflection of your own self-worth.
Are you constantly striving to be perfect?
Do you hear yourself saying the following?
"As I head the team up, my boss expects me to be the best at what I do."
"My parents used to punish me if I didn't get high grades."
"I am really neat and tidy, but this is a good thing right?"
"I have really high standards and I am not prepared to drop them."
The pitfall of perfectionism is being constantly concerned about making mistakes which often results in self-doubt, anxiety, depression, workaholism, procrastination, insomnia, eating disorders, amongst other issues.
Perfectionism also often results in low productivity at work as many waste time and energy on irrelevant details. Many set unrealistic, rigid, and inflexible goals and when they do not achieve them, they feel they are a failure.
If this is you then...
Let me be clear - There is a huge difference between excellence and perfectionism. When you make excellence your goal, your self esteem rises, your confidence increases and you feel good about yourself and achieving the goals you set. By focusing on perfectionism you are constantly 'shoulding' yourself. If you unpack 'should' you will find it is a way of beating yourself up.
You must get comfortable with accepting who you are, along with your flaws and empower yourself by stepping more into your authentic self.
This means adapting your own set of 'rules' to be more flexible and adjusting your guidelines to be more adaptable.
Embrace being okay with being 'perfectly imperfect'.
Ask yourself this question: "If I had really high self-esteem and self-confidence, what would I do?"
It's your time to shine!
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Caroline Wellingham - Accredited Career and Life Coach, NLP PractitionerJuly 12th, 2017