10 Confidence Boosters to Help Transform your Life!
20th November, 20130 Comments
Written by: Georgina Elliott - The London Confidence Coach
SELF-CONFIDENCE: how you perceive and feel about yourself and consequently, how you project yourself to the world underpins virtually everything you do in life.
Confident people do more, achieve more, interact more, and arguably get more out of life! Confidence gives you the spring in your step that enables you to do almost anything and create opportunities for yourself. Without confidence the world is an uncertain, daunting place from which there is a constant need to take cover.
The late, great Susan Jeffers, author of ‘Feel the Fear and do it Anyway’ wrote: “It comes from the knowledge that within you lies an immense amount of power and love to create all that you need in life. That’s confidence!”
And yes… confidence IS within all of us! Regardless of whether or not we’ve had much experience of it in our lives, it is there lurking in the hidden depths; the trick is to take action and FIND IT!
Here are 10 important tips to help you transform your life by unearthing some much needed self-esteem:
1) Ignore the critics! The world is full of many people who will stop at nothing to criticise, undermine and put dampeners on your sense of confidence and self-worth. This behaviour is often sadly a reflection of their own insecurities. DITCH THEM; and if that’s really not possible, limit contact or block them out. Surround yourself instead with positive, pleasant people who exude good energy and are very probably pretty confident themselves. In any case as soon as you start to bloom, the chances are the others will quite miraculously retreat to the shadows.
2) Let go of the past! Don’t let negative past experiences or events cloud your future. Learn from them, let go of them and start afresh! The past is gone…focus on the present, the future self you would like to become and the life you would like to have!
3) Make a change! Focus on one thing you would like to do or change (but have previously held back due to lack of confidence). Write it down as a GOAL, and the steps you need to take to achieve it. Visualise achieving it in as much detail as possible. See yourself achieving it, hear what others say, imagine tasting the glass of wine/slice of cake/slap up meal you celebrate with! Now start following your steps towards the goal. Start small if it’s easier. Once you see the results, the motivation comes to combat the next challenge…and so on. The bigger things can come a bit later on!
4) Focus on the good things! So often some of what needs to change is the way we see things. Do an audit of your life and really focus on the GOOD things in it; as well as all the attributes that YOU have to offer. Ignore everything else! Really take some time to try to focus on these on a daily basis. Turn them into affirmations and start to think, speak and write positive things about yourself. The people in this world who are grateful for the things they have as well as recognising their own positive attributes are the ones who are happiest, most confident and ready to take some great leaps forward…
5) Learn to say the word NO! There are people out there (and we’re all familiar with them) who will stop at nothing to ask unreasonable things of you, whether or not they’re aware of it. It’s important to set boundaries, not aim to please and end up with an unreasonable amount on your plate surrounded by the wrong people. Learn to be confidently assertive; and very reasonably say “no!”
6) Learn to say the word YES! Don’t be satisfied with a ‘risk free’ life that just consists of ‘what you know’. The only way to really accomplish anything is to take risks, so say ‘YES’ to going out of your comfort zone. Of course you will feel fear and discomfort, and very likely the negative voices in your head will be telling you all the reasons why you can't/shouldn’t/mustn’t…! Tell yourself (repeatedly) “I can do it!” However small, it really is where the magic happens; not least because of the satisfaction and buzz you will get from the experience. One word of warning though; it can become addictive!
7) Get on a plane! Travel (if you possibly can!) even just to somewhere you’ve never been that might be just a few miles away. Widening your experiences of places and people can be both a stimulating eye-opener and enormous confidence booster!
8) Don’t compare yourself to others! EVER! Comparison is confidence’s worst enemy! Shake off that childhood conditioning whereby you were always graded/compared/judged against your siblings/friends/school mates. We are all unique human beings…the sooner you embrace your individuality and really appreciate and love who YOU are, the quicker a strong sense of identity develops and thus a far greater sense of self-worth.
9) Get Physical! That doesn’t mean necessarily going to the gym, or anything else that may send shivers down your spine. But regularly getting your body moving gets the endorphins flowing and really does make you feel a gazillion times better about yourself! Whether it be regular walks, Zumba classes, or dusting down the old Raleigh bike, get a move on! Your state of mind will thank you for it.
10) Spend some quality time…with yourself! Get to know who you are and invest regular time being with yourself and developing a real sense of being happy in your own skin. Read, relax, meditate, write, watch movies, go to exhibitions, walk…being able to spend time on your own will move mountains in terms of giving you the space to get to know and make friends with yourself: arguably the most important friend you will need.
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