When you give in to your insecurities and self-doubt, they can steal the enjoyment out of the present and future. They can harm your personal development, making it feel like you’re simply treading water.
Many, if not all people have insecurities, but not everyone is controlled by them. We explore three ways to outsmart those insecurities.
1. Identify the illusion
Erich Fromm, a philosopher and psychologist, supplied us with this quote: “The task we must set for ourselves is not to feel secure, but to be able to tolerate insecurity.”
He believes that the way insecurities take hold of us is through illusion. Insecurities contribute to expectations and these expectations then turn into standards. As you grew up, you absorbed many social standards including how you should act and what you should do to be accepted. Some standards can be healthy, but others can be based on harmful and false illusions. These illusions can have a negative effect on your self-esteem.
One of the most common illusions is that it’s possible to live life without any insecurities at all. You believe that strong and successful people never doubt themselves and that many are born with the confidence to be successful. This contributes to your mission to meet that standard and instead of trying to neutralise the insecurities, you want to destroy them, which can’t necessarily be done. Following this path can leave you discouraged and frustrated.
2. Neutralise the threat
Understanding that everybody that you meet has a form of insecurity or self-doubt can help you realise that there’s nothing special about yours. This is an empowering place to be. You can now look at others who have conquered their fears and look at them for some more inspiration. You can reclaim control when making choices.
Listen to your insecurities – face your fears then remove their power.
3. Learn to laugh at yourself
One of the best remedies for your self-doubt is to laugh at yourself. No one wants to be embarrassed or fail, but it happens to all of us. So when it happens to you, the smart thing is to laugh it off. If you know you gave it everything you had but it didn’t work out, look back and laugh at it, then press on.
Once you identify and neutralise your insecurities, you will be able to take on new things and progress towards greatness.