If you have been caught then fess up. There is absolutely no point in continuing the masquerade because lying will only make the situation worse and ruin any chance of reconciliation. Just be honest and do not under any circumstances try to defend your actions and make excuses for yourself.
Give your partner the opportunity to vent. They will undoubtedly be angry and hurt and will lash out and perhaps say things you feel are unfair. Try very hard not to disagree and remember you are in the wrong. your partner is well within their rights to criticise your actions.
Know when to stop. There are two outcomes to this situation. One is that you manage to overcome the problem or the other is that you split up. You may be desperately sorry and devastated that your other half has no wish to reconcile but the future of your relationship is no longer in your hands.
Has your partner been unfaithful?
Don’t hold yourself responsible or wonder if you could have or should have been different because there is nothing you could have done.
Take some time out. Your emotions will be so up and down that it will take you a while to think about what it is that you really want. This decision will only be made more difficult by seeing your partner. You’ll experience stages of anger where you feel hate but ten minutes later you might find yourself really missing them.
Once you have given yourself enough time to evaluate the situation its time to make a decision. Have a clear perspective of what you want in the future and if you know deep down you can’t get over the betrayal then don’t give your partner the false hope.
If on the other hand, you believe it is possible to salvage your relationship then it is time to start dealing with the adultery. You will experience many bumps along the way but if you are determined to make your relationship work then you need to remember it will be a rocky road but there is every chance you could come out the other side with an even stronger relationship.